I met a guy who was not into sleeping with me. I was into him but found it odd that a guy was not into sleeping with me(i know i know). His reasonings changed. He claimed he was into getting to know me before sleeping with me but didn’t want to sleep with me right away. Then he claimed I have nothing on my body that makes him sexually attracted to me, no body is what he is saying. So I complained about it several times to him that it got him so worked up he said he will do it.. He tells me if he has sex with me and its not that good at sex he will stop talking to me. I changed my mind and said for us to not do it but he persisted that we do it since I begged. The topic never came up for about a few days until one day he asked me to hang out. He asked me what did i want to do or what places to go. It was late at night so there wasn’t many options. So I asked him and he couldn’t think of anything but then he says he has an idea and tells me we are going to have sex. So I agreed and he told me to wear something sexy for him but no pants. He went as far as to going to a friends house to get some condoms. He comes over and we have sex not really have sex but to “test me out”. The whole time im with him i dont bring up sex nor do I mention it but after 20 minutes of us talking he tells me to feel on his body then it leads to him wanting me to feel on his dick. We had sex and the next morning im guessing he had regrets and tells me he doesn’t want to do it again and never wanted to have sex in the first place but I begged for it. advice?
4 comments
Yuck. Yea, I would cut off communication with him. He sounds like the kind of guy that would blame women for his “masturbation addiction”.
You both are in the wrong here.
You continued to pursue someone who told you they weren’t interested in you. You “wore them down,” something people should rightfully be called out for.
He’s a piece of trash who flip-flopped on what he did or didn’t want, demeaned you, and then was unsurprisingly a very unsatisfactory sex partner.
You need to learn to respect your own boundaries before jumping into having sex with someone. I would definitely never talk to let alone hookup with this guy again.
Both. You were coercive. You didn’t accept his no or his reasons. He then turned that power dynamic on it’s head and did the same thing to you.
Not everyone will be sexually attracted to you. Of those who are, not all of them will want to have sex with you. You are not sexually attracted to everyone. Some of those you are attracted to, you won’t want to have sex with them. It’s just that simple. None of it is about you or your value. Sexual chemistry is unique to the people involved.
No one should ever have to justify their no or be pressured. Repeatedly asking, nagging, pleading, arguing logic, etc. are all coercive. Don’t do it. If someone is coercive, leave.
I would just move on. If he doesn’t or didn’t like it then he never will and that could bring you down my any levels. Find someone who loves your body and lives sex with you! You will find its so much more enjoyable not only that but You will not want to stop! Good luck! Xoxo o s7