F 23 Just hooked up with M 29 a few days ago and he wants to meet again. I do not. I’m a people pleaser so i said we could start hanging out, but now i’ve changed my mind. I lowkey just want to focus on myself for a while and not hook up with anyone. But unfortunately he knows where i live, and that my roommate is going to be out of town for quite sometime. As a single female that scares me. He also bought 2 packs of condoms to specifically meet up with me, and supposedly drove to 3 different gas stations to get them, then he left them here for “next time” So i feel like now i have to invite him back because of that. What should i do? how can i let him down nicely without making him upset or making him feel rejected?
9 comments
“sorry, I’m just not feeling it”
Be honest. Just say all you were after was a hookup and nothing more, say you had a good time but not interested in anything more.
I would argue that the best solution is to gather the courage and tell him that you are not interested in him anymore. I think that there is a huge chance he would understand. If you are still scared of his reaction, keep a friend on alert and don’t be afraid to call the cops if he bothers you
Tell him you have developed a medical issue, which you’re not prepared to disclose.
You can’t reject someone without making them feel rejected, and that’s okay. Rejection is part of life. It’s best to be direct and honest, in my opinion. u/KinkyInColo’s suggestion is perfect.
If you have real reason for concern about what he might do, then that’s a different situation and you should take steps to protect yourself before ending the relationship (like go stay with someone else, file a police report if relevant etc).
This is an excellent time to further develop your communication skills and boundary’s.
Just tell him that you are not interested in talking any further. you did your part. If he persist block his number and if he turns into a creep call the cops.
You don’t ghost. It’s mentally abusive. Just be honest
tell him u have a boyfriend and u just were on a break or something and recently got together again- that way he won’t feel insecure and overthink ur rejection too much
Best response is “I’m not feeling it.” It’s about you, not about them. It’s not something can argue about. It’s your feelings – can’t argue that. It’s kind but clear.