How do I mentally prepare for anal?

17 comments

1. Try it😉

2. Baby steps. Pay attention to his enjoyment as a way to help you develop new associations.

3. [deleted]

4. I had a bf who loved for me to play with his ass. We had never talked about it beforehand and he was straight. One day we were having sex and he said “play with my asshole” and I just did it in the heat of the moment. Not something I would have done on my own but it was hot when I could see his intensity shoot up. I mean, he REALLY liked it. So, for the rest of our relationship, I played with his ass–not every time but pretty often. It didn’t gross me out but I wasn’t into the act itself…I would just get off on him getting off. He was also amazing at hitting all my spots. I think actually doing it is less gross than thinking about it but don’t do anything that makes you feel bad afterwards. Don’t know if this helps at all, just thought I’d share.

5. Take it slow. Rubbing it with lube can be your first step. If you’re really concerned about cleanliness you can wear latex gloves lwhen you put a finger in. Obviously ask him to be clean, take a shower beforehand.

   You may find anal gross, my wife did at first, then she got into it, little by little. One thing anal is not, when done carefully and properly, dangerous.

6. Honestly I’d take it slow, and maybe don’t jump straight in to using a dildo. If you’re ambivalent to it then the negatives are going to outweigh the positives, and any mess, smells etc may make for an unpleasant experience.

   You could see if he wanted to wear a buttplug while doing other things that you are comfortable with, so it’s featuring but more passively and without you needing to be too involved. You can also tease him a bit with fingers, maybe rubbing instead of full penetration, and you can put a condom over your finger(s) if that would make you feel better too.

   It should go without saying but his hygiene is important – he should be very clean.

   Ultimately any sex act should appeal in some way to all parties involved. I’m not saying that unless you’re super into it you shouldn’t bother, but if you are feeling this negatively about it I think it’s pretty unlikely you would enjoy it.

7. This may be a bit strange but don’t think of it as a butt but rather just like anything else. Just like how you can get turned on from having your neck touch or thighs. He just gets turned on from his butt.
   Does he touch your butt? Do you like it? Does it make you tingly? It’s the same kind of feeling. Also you don’t have to go straight for it. You can start by just touching his butt. Squeezing or poking.
   Start somewhere you are comfortable just until you are comfortable touching his butt without overthinking?

8. If hes not use to anal play i wouldnt go straight in with a dildo, use smaller anal toys or even fingers to start out. For me, me and my partner were mid sex and we usually just did butt stuff with me but i lubed my fingers and started rubbing his butthole and just gently slipped my finger inside and he came within 20 seconds. Since then he has been a lot more open to it because he has explosive orgasms. And seeing him do that makes it more of a turn on for me and any thought of it being dirty or gross just completely leaves my mind, because hey, if sex isnt atleast a little bit dirty (saliva, cum, vaginal juices, lube everywhere) then wheres the fun in that🤣. Aslong as he cleans himself well and has good hygiene, you got it girl

9. Listen, if you aren’t comfortable, don’t do it, but if you’re willing. Use loads of lube, maybe start with small toys and go up size. Just go easy, but honestly, if you’re not keen, don’t let him pressure you.

10. If you’re trying to break the mental obstacle, you should start by finding an experience from someone (not you) that will portray it as erotic, exciting, and intense.

    Erotic literature with scenes of the female character’s first time anal is what I’m talking about. It will change your mindset.

11. It’s a good idea to be prepared for a little mess. have a towel under him and some thing to wipe up with. I agree with other posts that say ‘it’s sex. It’s messy. Cum, vag juices…” so give anal a bit of a pass like all that. I find folks like it when I show compassion and quickly wipe my cum off them even if they were all hot to get the cum on them, so I plan ahead with a wipe. I think of anal much the same.

12. Do not try and bend the dick (in your ass), that’s impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth… there is no dick. Then you’ll see that it is not the dick that bends, it is only yourself.

13. Tell him to touch your ass first. Little by little make progress. Have him touch and feel your ass . If you feel comfortable go to the next step. Which is try to have him may be give kisses on there. If you feel good and actually like the feeling tell him to slide his dick into your ass. Maybe slowly but surely you might enjoy that feeling

14. You can get pug plug sets that gradually increases in size. Those are great. Also using a duche makes it very clean. I was kinda grossed out dealing with at first.. even got rubber gloves 😂

15. I was in the same boat. We attempted a few times, but it wasn’t for me. I knew it was his kink, so I decided to give it a try again at 41. It was mind blowing and now I want it all the time. I was really missing out, but I think it was our techniques My tips 1) lots, I mean tons of lube 2) woman on her back with her pelvis elevated 3) have her use a vibrator on her clit 4) slow and steady 5) don’t worry about any mess, we’ve never had any – then again, take care of your business ahead of time and make sure you’re clean 6) enjoy. I hope it’s as amazing for you as it is for me.

16. Your bf isn’t bi because he enjoys anal , he’s bi because he’s attracted to both sex’s. Anal can be extremely intimate. A woman pegging man is straight sex. Why is this so hard for people to wrap their heads around ?

17. Have you tried reading erotica? That’s what worked for me with rimming. I was mildly grossed out by the idea, but after reading a bunch of super hot descriptions of the way receiving it felt, I was intrigued. I think it was better than visual porn because I didn’t have to look at anybody’s asshole, you know? Definitely increased my comfort level.