I (F18) think about him every time I orgasm and it’s distracting and annoying.

A few months ago decided I would deny myself orgasms and I started talking to one of my friends more around that time. He was also denying himself so I’d talk to him about my frustrations. It was really fun and thrilling talking to him while I was constantly horny. I succumbed so I decided to not orgasm until the end of the year. We talked a lot during late December about sex, my kinks and frustrations and other things. I would think about him every time I got horny. End of December we argued over something that was completely my fault and we stop talking for a bit. Things aren’t the same at all.

The problem now is that I’m masturbating again but every time I do I think of him. It’s annoying. I watch lesbian porn but every time I orgasm I think about how I would look to him if he was there and a multitude of other dirty things. I can’t even watch straight porn because I think of him. It’s quite frustrating and a turn off afterwards because I don’t think it’s realistic to see him that way anymore. This is sorta a vent but I’m also asking for advice but I’m not optimistic about any quick fixes. Is there anyway to stop?