How can one develop the nonchalant I don’t give a fuck type attitude?

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  1. It comes naturally after life fucked you enough times, but if life is kind to you that’s very hard to achieve

  2. open your eyes and see how cruel and selfish the world and especially women really are. Educate yourself and focus on your own passions. The better you do building yourself the more you demand others do the same and the less you care about those who don’t.

  3. I suppose not actually giving a fuck would help but you do give a fuck because you’re here, on reddit, seeking advice, that’s a lot of fucks.

  4. It’s more of a “this isn’t worth stressing over or worrying about” attitude that you want to shoot for. You can give a Fuck about some things but some things don’t require the energy that people think it requires.

  5. Go through some hard shit in your life and just realize that everyting will end in some moment so just don’t give a fuck

  6. Having a healthy level of confidence in yourself (not to be confused with arrogance). Confidence in who you are as a person, your ability to problem solve and be self reliant, and some life experiences to let you know that most things aren’t as significant as you may think they are.

    Being secure with who you are goes a very long way.

  7. There’s this eastern philosophy of living life without expecting anything, that will bring anything you need when needed. That helps a lot. But you have to truly not expect anything, not just pretend so things arrive.

  8. Honestly, it comes from adopting a new perspective on life. It’s one thing to know another perspective, but you actually have to believe it to truly not give a fuck. I’ve written the same mindsets in a Guide for the Socially anxious I’m still developing; see if one of these resonate:

    * We are all going to die soon anyway. Humans have been around for about 2 million years. Average life span is around 75-85. So a human life is like 0.00375% of all the time humans have been around. Everyone is equally insignificant.
    * Every human you ever meet has, at least one in their life, had stomach wrenching diarrhea. Think about how vulnerable/hilarious they looked in that situation.
    * Everyone is your superior in some way. Be it physically, mentally or emotionally. So then, by extension, you are superior in one of these ways compared to everyone else. The mindset of doing everything and talking to everyone for the sake of learning makes reasons not to do things seem insignificant.

    I’m away from my manuscript, so unable to remember some of the others at this time. These ones, though, do seem to be some of the bigger ones I’ve seen circulating from all my reading and research.

  9. Developing the confidence that what ever the hell happens, you’re good. Ask a girl if she would like a drink, she says no, fuck it, the next one will say yes. Get laid off at work, fuck it, that job sucked and the next job will be better. The homies can’t hang out, fuck them, they are missing out. You’ll catch them next time.

    Doesn’t mean you actually say fuck it that much though…

  10. By realizing that most people do not care what you do since you’re just a stranger. Especially if you’re a man, most people will not give af about you anyways so caring will only hurt you.

  11. My sister told me that I have a nonchalant attitude, but it isn’t something that I wasn’t conscious about. But in all honesty, I am just into the things I am into. Martial arts, DJ, art, etc. So since I am so focused on my hobbies and interests, I tend to not pay other things any mind.

    On the other hand, I also lived a very hard life and have developed a certain hardness that was brought on from just living in survival mode for so long. It is great when it comes to sniffing out bs, and people trying to slick you. But at the same time, it does make you a bit alienating. Especially when it comes to dating. The ladies like the strong silent type, but they don’t even understand that the trauma that brought that seemingly strong silent type on is not a good thing.

    But in simple terms, if you don’t want to give a fuck, then stop giving a fuck. But you have to be righteous in not caring. Don’t fake it.

  12. I look at things, people and situations on a scale. Is this worth my energy or effort? No? Then move onto what is worth my focus.

  13. Have your heart broken and get utterly fucked by life. Then when you hit the bottom you completely stop caring.

  14. Once you fully understand how much of a joke a lot of people and a lot of aspects of society are, you naturally just feel *behooved* not to take much of it seriously any longer.

    It’s really that simple

  15. You must first be emotionally broken many many times in your life, and preferably be seen as a weirdo, interloper, and outcast from any kind of normal social experiences. You must also realize how terrible humanity is, and exchange any remaining empathy towards normies for indifference by choice. You must accept the meaninglessness of existence and be ready to shake deaths hand at any moment. Then, you truly transcend, giving zero fucks about anything and the best part is nothing can hurt you anymore, because you’re already dead on the inside and emotions drip away like a rain upon stone.

    It’s amazing how free we become when we are no longer shackled by the slavery society attempts to pin on us.

  16. 1. Focus on what really matters. A random person giving me shit: they literally don’t matter to me.

    2. Finding the things in life that do matter, and the things that you can do to make you matter to other people. My family matters to me, and I matter to them.

  17. Focus on things you do care about. Over time you’ll figure out what’s worth not giving a fuck about

  18. Ever since I can remember I’ve had this kind of behavior. People always asked why I’m so quiet or I look bored all the time. It’s because I don’t give a fuck about anything that’s going on. I can’t explain it but it sucks. Over time this developed to the point where I don’t care what happens to me, not that I would do anything intentionally to myself but if I get into a car crash or something, then oh well. That’s something people close to me can’t understand, and I have no way to explain or make them understand.

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