I’m 23 years old and have only ever achieved a clitoral “orgasm” after masturbating. I’ve never had a g-spot orgasm, let alone felt ANYTHING from penetration alone. I’ve had several partners and opportunities to feel something. I pretend I like and feel sex with friends when I really just fake it. Sex does nothing for me. While I’ll get aroused and very wet prior to sex, the act does nothing and I sometimes get dry by the time we’re dont having sex. I want to understand why I can’t achieve a “real” orgasm, and ejaculate like other women do during their orgasm. (Not squirting, just secretions during orgasm that come out). I’m wondering if I could have sexual trauma due to SA as a child? Could this be it? How do I fix it
4 comments
Check my last post. Not everyone can orgasm from penetration and that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with your body
You are absolutely having real orgasms. All orgasms are clitoral orgasms. And what you’re (not) feeling with your vagina is very normal.
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-clitoris-uncovered-an-intimate-history/
Quick anatomy lesson. The insides of the vagina are made of basically the same kind of tissue as inside your mouth. So, no fun nerve endings there which explains why penetration feels like nothing. The clitoris has some internal parts that can be stimulated indirectly by putting pressure on the walls but this doesn’t work for everyone. It depends on how turned on you are and on the configuration of your internal anatomy which is unique to you. This is why women’s experiences during sex are so varied.
You’re also 23. You’re young, you’re learning your body and what works for you. It’s ok that you haven’t figured everything out yet. You can orgasm from your clitoris which is normal and amazing. If you’d like to learn more about your body and increase your sexual wellbeing, pick up books like Sex For One and Come As You Are.
How much foreplay are your partners engaging in? It is possible that you may never have an orgasm from penetrative sex but it is important that you are with a partner who you are very attracted to who spends a very very long time on foreplay and does not Rush the penetrative act. In a perfect world they will have already given you a clitoral orgasm and are going slowly enough moving towards and creating some desire for the penetration. It is tough now because you have all kinds of emotions wrapped up into someones efforts so that will make it even harder and the person has to be even more patient to establish if it is possible to have a penetrative orgasm. Not all women do. But it helps if you have a partner who is willing to do the ground work with no expectations in a stress free environment.
You are having real orgasms, the clitoris is a huge organ and it makes you orgasm. Its very common to not orgasm from penetration. I am a man and i dont enjoy penetration, too.
For males, its very similar. Its very hard to orgasm just by stimulation of the penis shaft, it needs stimulation of the penis head.
I think the best solution is to focus on clit stimulation and dont do penetration. Its not that important.