My crush (M36) texted me (F28) out of a sudden a few days ago. We talked about different things, he was really nice to me, maybe even a little bit playful. The next day we talked again.
It’s great, but the thing is it gives me hope. I honestly don’t think he is interested in anything else but just friendship. It already happened a few times. He just texted me out of a blue, flirted with me and then just disappeared.
He is an extremely interesting and unique person. It’s a pleasure to talk to him from time to time. But the thing is, every time he acts like this, I start expecting something from him and get really upset when I realize that my expectations were too high.
How to stop expecting love? How to stop hoping to hear from your crush again? How to stop waiting for his messages and getting upset in case he doesn’t text?
I have a life – an interesting job, friends, hobbies… but sometimes it all just don’t work. Every time we start talking again, I hope that this time things will work out.
TL;DR: Every time my crush texts me I start expecting he will ask me out and we start dating. But it just doesn’t happen and I’m looking for ways to stop expecting a lot from him.
2 comments
Have you told him how you feel about him? How do you know he isn’t interested in you? You could also ask him out yourself and see what happens
You can try to ask him out, but you have already mentioned that he might not be interested in anything serious. I assume you have talked about it or he has expressed his general point of view. I had it with a guy I was dating, and I would also get very upset when I saw that he was just looking for some attention when he needed it, texting me or meeting me on his terms, but once I felt my needs and wanted to get something also for myself, it was not possible. You can either try to accept it in your head and remember that this has no romantic future with him, which is just very hard tbh, or try to be less available when he reaches out again. Not to play with him, but be truly less attached in this story. He apparently makes it only when it suits him and how it works for him. Just remember it next time he will appear again and ask yourself if you want to give him your attention without anything in return.