The attention that I get from being conventionally attractive makes me feel empty inside. It’s like men aren’t really interested but then when they see me, all of a sudden they’re no longer passive, they’re super nice, and show more patience. I understand it but it also feels so superficial.
This has happened when people I knew years ago see me now (a more attractive version of myself) and are interested or even if I pop up on instagram after not posting for a while.
I had a guy friend tell me once that getting guys is so easy, all girls have to do is post an instagram story. Yes that is true but the attention I get from it doesn’t make me feel good. Especially explicit comments give me major ick, in a way it also makes me feel disrespected.
This probably sounds like a sob story about being attractive and I get that there’s way bigger issues out there. I just wish I could actually feel like men were interested in me for me, not feel like I’m just an object they’d like to attain. Just wanted to let these feelings out and see if anyone relates or wanted to add their two cents.
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Yeah, totally get where you’re coming from. It sucks when people only seem interested in you for your looks. And it can be especially frustrating when it’s people you’ve known for a while who are suddenly all over you because of your appearance. But remember, you’re more than just your looks and you deserve to be treated with respect and valued for who you are. Try to surround yourself with people who appreciate you for you and don’t just focus on your looks.
Ive also struggled with this. For me, getting out in nature helps and making the world around me more beautiful. I guess because get told every day that I am beautiful, but I understand the importance of external and internal beauty and also in creating beauty for others. I realize that true lasting beauty is in creating lasting beauty for others. For me, I do that with gardening.
I like to plant trees and start new ones from from the branches bc to give to others and plant and grow flowers (perennials) thst will be here and add enduring beauty to the world long after I’m gone.
But, some people are artistic and like to spead beauty and joy with their works of art. In Each expressive piece they create they leave enduring beauty.
Others have the beautiful talents of making music and singing or writing lyrics or even poetry. (Oh how I wish I could play the piano!) But, those with these gifts have such a beautiful legacy!
There are so many other forms and gifts of enduring beauty such as writing and others I’m not thinking of. But, each day I try to think of ways to make the world more beautiful, and for me there’s nothing more beautiful than nature, so I always head there.
Hope this helps and hope you have a beautiful day!
What’s Instagram?
Cant relate 🫠
My hot take? Interact with something or someone who has no skin in the game, or an animal. I think people tend to value beauty when it’s relevant to them, but people who aren’t attracted to you who like you, just friends, and animals. Both give a better version of conditional love, than a romantic partner. Also, and this may just be a thought, interact in ways where people can’t see you. That may help. Sounds weird, but you know if people want to interact with you for you. I will however say, I absolutely respect your confidence, I wish I fucking knew if I was attractive or not, alas body dysmorphia runs in the family 😎.