This is especially strange to me when it’s slow at work and I’m absorbed in a side project; I’ll be focused on something and I’ll hear someone start to talk. I usually assume that they aren’t talking to me, since they didn’t do anything to get my attention (walk over to my desk, say my name, even clear their throat) first and there are other people in the room. It’ll take me a few moments to realize they’re speaking to me. Sometimes they’ll just fall silent and walk away before I realize.
Doing this makes me feel incredibly rude, but I feel like the alternative is to remain only half-focused on my side project just in case someone wants to talk to me. What should I be doing differently?
3 comments
You shouldnt be worried about it. If they want to talk to you, they should get your attention.
Do you have a hearing issue? I have had one instance where I missed a question, and purely because of a slightly strange situation I felt I had missed something, when I questioned the … vibe? It turns out I missed it. (Albeit the person is a notorious mumbler)
There are multiple cues in regards to conversation. Vocal, visual, dont feel ashamed to let them know you were unaware they were talking.
For all you know it could be someone whos socially awkward and unaware of what they are doing wrong.
*checks reddit for a similar post of reversed positions*
If they just start to talk without making sure you’ve got their attention they are playing a power game they shouldn’t. You do absolutely right by ignoring them. I wouldnt dream of listening to a colleague that just starts talking.
Privately I get annoyed at people doing this. I recognize that extroverts like to do this while talking to each other, fine. But I just shut up until they get their asses up and actually adresses me.