I’ve been travelling for the past couple of months and I primarily stay in hostels. Now the general opinion out there is, if you want to make new friends, you hang out in the common areas of a hostel.
I did that religiously. Also, since in some places, common areas double as co-working space, it was kinda necessary for me to be there for long periods of time because of my work. During all this time I saw other people meet each other, hit it off, make plans with each other, hook-up and whatnot.
But for some reason, I wasn’t approached at all. There’s something inherently unapproachable about me or the way I carry itself apparently. I don’t know what it could be apart from my male RBF. I’m guessing that there’s something about my body language that indicates that I’m not up for small talk or a conversation.
Does anyone else have similar experiences where they find themselves in social situations and surroundings but end up not socializing at all? Any tips on how to amend this?
2 comments
I would try opening up your shoulder and sit up straight, then look around the place. Then people will assume you are interested in communicating.
The body language is effective. For example, when you stand straight (standing) and fold your arm is not friendly and not approachable. I read psychology book growing up and the body language and learned quite a lot. If you are interested I can look up that book or some other for you.
If your body language is closed, no one will approach you. Why did you not try to approach anyone? Apparently there must be other guests just like you who wait for someone to approach them.