Why is it that the more someone doesnt show interest on us the more we like them?

12 comments

1. I don’t know, dude. Why do *you* like someone more when they rebuff you?

2. People always want what they cant have.

3. How often do women show interest without a man earning it?

   Every hunter knows the most valuable prey is going to be the hardest to get, so when there’s a chance to be had, the primal hunter in all of us awakens to tell us to pursue.

4. That hasn’t been my experience. I like women who like me. Indifference isn’t all that sexy. But if I had to guess, I’d say they feel more validated by winning over someone they perceive as unobtainable. Maybe it’s a bigger accomplishment or something. I don’t know, I’m lazy. I like the kind of girl who just falls effortlessly into my lap, lol.

5. Women tend find commitment/dedication in men to be attractive, so it could be that one associates the lack of interest as commitment/dedication to a task that otherwise would draw their attention away. In men, I am less clear why this would happen. I would hazard to guess that the guy is just read too much into a girl and mistakenly assumed she was interested. I have observed this phenomenon before and even fallen victim to it before.

6. Rejection bias…. its a trait of avg or below average human

7. I think this is an ego thing.

   Seeking validation from someone who isn’t giving it to you is a journey to get validation.

   When you do get that validation, it’s like a success story.

   Imagine what it might be like when you DO get their attention. Would that feeling go way ? that excitement ?

8. so what now? should i just tell him i like him and just get it over with or just leave it the way it is?

9. Because if he’s interested in you, you’re not into him.

10. Because you’re delusional

11. I have never understood this. I have no interest in someone who shows no interest in me, and if it’s some kind of game to see if I’ll chase them, that’s even worse.

12. neediness, and ego. people who need other people to validate them will chase people who reject them.