I have a big problem. I cringe at too many things. It made me super dry and not fun to be with. How do I let go of it? First I want to have the courage to do it regardless of if I find it cringy or not. Then I really like to not find them cringy. How do I let go of this gaurd?

19 comments

  2. Cringe is a combination of judgment and fear. Judgment that what you’re looking at isn’t valuable, and fear that you’ll be seen as less than. In the end, it’s you judging yourself and keeping yourself in line. So the only way is to allow yourself to be a little silly. Let loose a little bit. Say a dumb joke. Embarrassment comes and go, but you’ll learn to be yourself.

    And if stuff really is too cringey to do, why stay there? Go find your people, your activities, your hobbies. You don’t need to force yourself to participate in dumb shit.

  3. You have to explain OP. What is too many things? You have to understand why you find each of these things cringey and see if that feeling is misplaced or not. Is telling someone you love them cringey? Is winning a competition cringey? If you want real info you have to get more specific

  4. Just remember you are not any better than everyone else. We are all humans and all humans are goofy.

  5. On a psychological level, I would return to your earliest childhood memories of experiencing cringe. Maybe you were being yourself and judged for it. I think that’s where it starts for everyone; cringe is learned. Theory: the first instance anyone experienced cringe was a judgment casted on them, or a judgment casted on someone in proximity to them. Not sure a child would cringe or judge naturally or instinctively. I would return to those earliest moments and shift your perspective to a lens of love and appreciation for whatever unique part of your personality, or for a very understandably human mistake you made. As long as you are still judging that part of you internally on a subconscious level, your conscious will hold that judgment and apply it to it’s present. I believe cringe is usually deep rooted in this way, and harder to overcome without reviewing all the cringe you experienced growing up (childhood-teens-present) and reframing it around neutral / loving acceptance or forgiveness. Rooted in a belief that everyone deserves to be their most authentic selves openly and unashamedly, and that everyone deserves a chance to make a mistake and learn from it. The principles, morals, and beliefs you put merit in will really shape your reality in this way, so it’s important you question the negative beliefs your cringe (or anything really) is rooted in. Hope this helps.

  6. You’ve got to feel the fear and do it anyway. Courage. Recklessness. Whatever you want to call it.

    Fear is the blocker of action. Falling from the sky and landing safely (with a parachute) is the only way your brain will produce the chemicals necessary to overwrite what was previously fearful.

  8. Omg! I have the same problem, sometimes I just cringe so hard that I want to disappear 😹😹😹😹

  12. You’re being really judge mental for some reason. Maybe you’re being too harsh on yourself, maybe you’re stressed out? think of what maybe is putting this pressure onto you, that you now feel the need to project that judgement, stress, onto others? Are you scared of others opinions of you and why. Maybe do some journaling

  13. It helps me to remember that no one out in the world cares about me or is paying attention to me. In a freeing way. Do whatever you want! No one cares.

  17. As others have said, cringing at what other people are doing or situations, etc. means you’re being judgmental and it’s manifesting as second-hand embarrassment.

    I agree with the psychologist guy about how it’s probably something that formed earlier in life when someone else was judgmental towards you and made fun of you for something you did, or a situation you were embarrassed in.

    However, I don’t think it matters too much the how and the why, so long as you wrap your head around the fact that you are inflicting the same judgement that’s been passed on you to others.

    People are imperfect, people make mistakes, situations get embarrassing. You’ve gotta be more forgiving to yourself and others. The imperfections we all have are what make us unique – we gotta love those parts of ourselves and others. Once you start to realize that not everything has to be so serious, the cringe will become funny.

    You don’t need to try to control or take responsibility for other people’s actions, they are their own people.

    It’s not easy to retrain your thought processes, but it can be done! A little compassion goes a long way 🙂

  19. You are a tree.

    A tree has a trunk, branches and leaves.

    If something is bothering you, likely it’s just some leaves on one branch. Does a tree shrink back into itself when some leaves are brushed by something annoying? No, it just keeps on being a tree.

    You being cringe is only one part of who you are, you have whole other branches – the things your good at, your relationship with your parents and family, your school or work work, the way you do that simple thing ‘your way’ that no one knows about, and on and on.

    So, when your tree gets a bit ruffled, just take a deep breath, expand your tree and all it’s other branches and move on, just like a tree would.

    —

    Also, if you’re worried about others, they’re trees as well, if you ruffle some of their leaves they probably won’t remember and will focus on some other branch of leaves in their lives.

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