So my (28F) best friend Matthew (29M) was dating this guy, Logan (28M) for about a month. They moved very fast in this relationship and decided to move in together. I liked Logan at first, he seemed like a down to Earth person and he was easy to talk to. He had a great personality and everything.

Well, the crazy crown came on after he moved in with Matthew. They had an argument and Logan called the cops on him over some petty fight. Naturally this scared Matthew and he broke it off with Logan.

I was out of town when this happened and Logan called me telling me that Matthew had broken up with him and could I try to talk to him about it and get him to call him. I told him it wasn’t my business what was going on between them and I was out of town trying to visit my family that I hadn’t seen in years. He persisted and went off on a tangent talking about how Matthew is a sick person, then going back and forth between that and then saying Matthew is supposed to be “his person”. He started to blow up my phone and it got to a point where I just started to ignore him.

Every time my phone would go off, it would be Logan begging me to pick up the phone and talk to him. I finally caved and answered the phone, hoping that if I told him straight up that it was over and there was nothing to be done, he would accept it and back off. Nope. He was in hysterics saying he’d never do anything to hurt Matthew and he was sorry and to please get him to call him back. I told him there was nothing I could do to help, Matthew made his decision and if he wanted to fix things, he would’ve called by now. He just wouldn’t accept that.

Well, he kept blowing up my phone every 30 mins to an hour, which was ruining my family time, so I had to end up blocking him. I felt bad, but it really isn’t my problem and I figured once he realized that he was blocked he would leave me alone. Nope. He downloaded an app to get a new number and started calling and texting me from that number, so I blocked that one too.

This morning, he came up with yet another new number and started to blow my phone up. I told Matthew that Logan is harassing me, and he told me that I am not the only one he is doing this to. Logan is also sending Matthew emails and messaging his family and friends the same way he is to me. Matthew told him he was going to get a restraining order. That didn’t stop him.

Matthew actually went to the courthouse to file for a restraining order but was told that because Logan moved to another state, there was nothing to be done. So, the police are useless in this situation.

I’m at a loss. It’s been over a month, and he keeps reaching out to me using different numbers. What am I supposed to do at this point?? I want no part of this drama and I have to answer my phone when strange numbers call me for work sometimes, but now I don’t want to answer because what if it’s Logan?

Should I just talk to him and tell him to stop? Should I continue to block him with each new number he gets and hope that he’ll stop harassing me? Any advice would be helpful.

TL;DR: My best friend’s crazy ex won’t stop messaging me despite me blocking him multiple times. The police are of no help. I don’t know how to make him stop.

3 comments
  1. Block him on everything you can block him on and get yourself a new phone number, and make that number private. Don’t engage him at all. That just tells him that all he has to do is keep trying.

    I don’t know about US law, but could you file a civil suit and ask for harassment damages, or engage a lawyer to file a ceast and desist letter to him?

  2. Try r/legaladvice. Moving states shouldn’t stop a restraining order. There should be some legal recourse.

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