We matched on hinge in December, had a great first date 2 days later. He texted the next day saying he loved getting to know me. Then we both left to travel (separately ofc) for a month. He texted a few times asking when I would be back/wishing happy holidays etc.
The week that I was supposed to come back, he texted to make a plan with me. We agreed for dinner which he ended up forgetting about (my previous post). We still met that night, had a bunch of chemistry, I stayed the night. We texted a day later, I asked him how he felt about everything, he said “great” and “we are yours” referring to him and his dog.
We saw each other one more time, and he tried asking me to come over again that week but I didn’t see his message until I woke up the next morning. Then the convo died, tho I suggested we should go see an exhibit at some point, and he said he would love that.
We then haven’t seen each other for 2 weeks (he changed job and his schedule was new and hectic + I travelled during weekends) but had a plan to meet this past Sunday to go to exhibit. He texted me on a Friday night saying he would have to work and won’t be able to make it anymore but we could hangout now or maybe tomorrow (Saturday).
Also that same evening I was out with a girlfriend of mine and we were talking about dating apps. Apparently, she also matched with him a week prior. It made me feel sad but I also understand we are not exclusive.
Anyways, he called me on Sunday after work to see me. We spent the whole evening and night together, walked his dog in the morning. He kept saying lovely things how he missed me, calling me “his girl”, and saying things he liked about my personality etc. We texted throughout Monday and he asked me to come over again on a Monday evening. I did.
But this time he was really tired from work, and I was too. Also, I learned he was taking adderall which made more sense about his behavior. Also, when he was closing apps on his phone in front of me, I saw hinge with a bunch of matches. That did hurt.
Now I don’t know where to take it. I am falling bad for this guy and I truly want to continue getting to know him (he is so smart and amazing), at the same time his forgetfulness and attention issue bugs me + him talking to girls on hinge (such as my friend) and always me coming over to his (not much effort in seeing me outside). From the beginning he said he was looking for a relationship but I am not sure if what we have is going in that direction. I probably should talk to him, idk where to start tho.
1 comment
I think a good place to start is having a conversation about going exclusive (but not necessarily in a relationship).
I met an ex through Tinder that I went on several dates with, and it turns out that in that first week or two, she went on a couple of other ones. I wasn’t too bothered, mostly because of the honesty, but also because we hadn’t had that conversation yet. We did a few weeks later though, and that’s when expectations became more fair.
It sounds like you two have been steadily going on dates for a bit now. If you want to take that next step, have that convo. If it doesn’t go well for whatever reason, then you have all the info you need.