Hello, I’m a young entrepreneur, I work directly next to my worker .. maybe 10 feet away? He smells like shit. I don’t know how else to say it. It’s bad. It’s everyday. He’s married with two kids. It smells like as if he takes a shit and does not wipe throughly and then goes about his day. It’s worse in the winter than summer. I don’t know how to tell him. I spray fabreze and cologne all the time. He does not get the hint. Help.

35 comments

  5. That’s unfortunately the thing, if he’s not taking hints you have to tell him.

    Do so respectfully. You don’t know the full story as to why he’s doing this. As much as you would like it to be “Yeah, I’m lazy but I’ll get it taken care of going forward” it’s usually not.

    Things like this can and do dive into sensitive issues, especially mental health. Maybe he’s been on the precipice of divorce for months now and stopped taking care of himself, maybe he has a medical condition, or maybe there’s another tragic reason for this.

    I’d probably start off like this:

    “Hey Dave, thanks for meeting with me. I just wanted to pull you aside to talk about a personal topic. It’s been brought to my attention that you tend to have a strong body odor that a few employees are finding unpleasant. I know this is probably news to you and not something anyone would to hear, so I apologize. But just for my purposes here, I do have to ask you to take a few extra scrubs during your morning shower so we can leave this behind us. Sound good?”

    You don’t know what you don’t know and hopefully that’ll be a big enough nudge in the right direction.

  6. Dude get to work before he does and leave a basket with shower stuff at his desk with a note like : “hey Steve you smell like shit. Please shower (: “

  7. Just tell him. This is what’s wrong with this generation. They can’t have tough, honest 1 to 1 conversations with anyone because they’re not used to it. They’re so accustomed to social media and the anonymity of the Internet that they don’t have the balls or skills to look another human in the eye and be honest with them. Stop looking for another answer, just tell him.

  8. I’d just ask to move my desk. Fixes issue and you don’t have to deal with drama.

    Have someone else that’s moody deal with it.

  9. That is the hardest conversation I have ever had with an employee. I could almost guarantee that he was not wiping properly, in addition, he didn’t shower daily.

    “There are some people that can skip a shower for a day or two. You are not one of them. I need for you to shower every day and wear deodorant [another issue]. I have noticed that there are some [all] days that you have a particularly strong odor and it’s distracting”

    We also work with clients – that shit did not fly

  10. I had an ex coworker who funkd up an office so I sent him a Skype message, clear, concise and respectful.
    Told him people can block out sight/sound issues but smell was impossible. Didn’t help. Went on another day or two and contacted his supervisor and this dude threw a fit like a 3yr old. Some people are just ignorant and apathetic.

  11. Stop hinting. Either be direct and tell him “hey man idk if you have a laundry problem or a hygeine problem but you smell like feces/decay/specific thing and it’s nauseating. It’s a problem and you need to solve it.” Or if it’s a big company tell your manager or directly to HR that they need to do this ASAP. This is a common problem and any reasonably competent HR person or manager knows how to solve it.

  12. I don’t get this.
    I come from the East part of the world living in the west now.
    People doesn’t have the balls to say that you smell bad. If things are not effecting you I understand but if they are then just raise your concern. Better for both of you this way, you don’t suffer anymore and he won’t get hurt by someone who might be mean to him for this reason.

  13. Are you the manager? Then you need to have this conversation head-on. It’s a terrible conversation to have to have but it’s a necessary part of management.

  14. A guy at my work has been told by people multiple times and he seems to not care. He’s about 320lbs with a skullet. I feel your pain

  16. I told someone to take a shower and I lost a friend. Haha I seriously gave all the hints in the world. Saying I like good smells. Even maybe we should go cologne shopping. Well at least I don’t have to smell him anymore haha

  17. I’ve been the guy that smells before and I didn’t know it. You need to tell him, be honest, and he needs to feel the shame and embarrassment to force him to change. It is for the best.

  18. I would ask him to have a quick chat about something important. Once you’ve gotten his full attention as he probably thinks it’s very serious, lay it on him. Politely of course.

    “Hey your phenomenal at your job but as of late its been tough working with you, you have a really strong odor.”

    Second part should be used if he’s really not getting it after the first part.

    “I’ve tried to notify you before with the use of air fresheners but you haven’t gotten the hint, do you think you can stay on top of your hygiene moving forward it’s become something of a nuisance.”

  19. “hey bro did you take a shower this morning?”

    -He says no

    “yeah I can tell. Make sure you do take one every morning moving forward alright?”

    -He says yes

    “Interesting. Either your shower soap isn’t working, or your laundry detergent isn’t. Which one do you think it is?”

  20. I had something like this once. I didn’t say anything and just gave him a deodorant and his reaction was “oh thanks” and the smells stopped afterwards

  21. Someone told me I smell once. I didn’t even know it ..I was happy to hear someone was being honest over the year I was bullied about it and didn’t even know 😂

  23. I’ve had the same conversation with my roommate. Sometimes you just have to be blunt, in the end you’re doing both parties a favour

  24. I have a friend like this and I haven’t said anything because he’s kinda shy but I think maybe his nose doesn’t work? His whole
    House stinks and his clothes stink too. It’s weird

  27. Hand him a stick of deodorant and say “you need this buddy” and walk away. Or just say something, saying something will definitely be more effective though.

  29. I think it’s be appropriate for you to speak to him when it is only the two of you. That way any embarrassment can be a little more controlled. You should be honest and kind with the delivery. I would say something like

    Hey name, how are you? Answer. Im good too! Has everything been ok at home with the wife and kids? Answer. —- insert appropriate response to whether he says yes or no—- ( ok awesome or im sorry to hear that)…

    I have to speak with you about something that might be a little uncomfortable, but I’d really appreciate it if someone came to me if the roles were reversed. I’m not sure what the situation is exactly but your body odor has been a bit strong lately. Everyone has body odor, so this isn’t anything to overthink about. I just wanted to let you know because it’s such an easy and effortless fix that I really didn’t want for people to speak ill of you over something like this. I’m sorry if I over stepped, but this is what friends are for 🙂 << big and friendly smile and maybe a pat on the shoulder. Laugh it off if appropriate.

  30. You’ll do him a great service by telling him. We love in a society where no one says anything and everyone suffers in silence.

  31. I used to deal with this in a tiny little diet lab. The woman smelled terrible to the point where even the boss said something to her. It didn’t help. I eventually quit (not because of that, but as far as i know it was never resolved). I would honestly get HR involved because I’m not sure what they consider a hostile environment

  32. I do just want to tell you that sometimes things like this aren’t hygiene issues. It can be linked to digestive health or diet instead but obviously that won’t be the case for most people. Some really good advice has been given already. If it’s just a matter of him needing more showers, he might not even know about it and if you’re able to tell him, he’ll probably be glad about it

  34. gotta give it to him straight “hey bro there’s no easy way to say this but you smell like shit”

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