I (30s/M) started exploring anal when I was a teenager and it’s been a regular part of my life since. I have multiple toys, my wife has a strapon, etc. I’ve always loved it, until about 2 months ago. I went from regularly craving it, to it feeling foreign and invasive to have anything up there. My overall sex drive is still strong. Mentally I still want anal. But when I actually try to use my toys it’s just incredibly uncomfortable. Does anyone else have experience with this?
6 comments
OP, I’m not a doctor.
With that said, you may want to see your doctor about prostate health. Maybe something has changed? The discomfort you mentioned is what tipped me off, but again – *I am not a doctor*. Hope it’s nothing like that. But best to check if you’re able to.
[deleted]
Assuming no medical issues, our kinks/desires will ebb and flow over time. Some stay with us, some come, some go. You may grow tired of something and stop doing it and then one day it comes back. In your case, I would say just give it a rest, try something else for a while. There is such a huge world of sexuality and pleasure to explore.
I’d get a check up for you prostate health as well. Sudden loss of interest *could* be indicative of something medically that’s changing. Not to alarm, but better to be abundantly safe, especially with prostate health. Prostate cancer (just as an example, not saying this is indicative) is known for creeping up on people.
But if there are no medical concerns; then yeah sometimes our turn ons change and the sensations change too.
Assuming there is no medical or physical issues, maybe take anal off the table for a bit? Sometimes, desires and fantasies changes over time. Maybe after a pause, your interest will come back but if it’s no longer pleasurable for you, don’t force yourself.
I had an issue where it didn’t feel as good as it used to. It was more about the actual anus not feeling it.
I took a few months off. I went back to basics. Witch hazel wipes for any itching feeling. A toilet seat with a washer thingie to use instead of a lot of wiping. A lot of stuff to pamper my bum.
When I started again is was small toys. A relaxing (not numbing) lube called Backdoor. For strapon play I moved to a soft dual silicon dildo.