If you asked the woman or man, (*he’s an electrician and has type one diabetes but I don’t think him having diabetes has anything to do with it*.) you had been hooking up with for months if you could come over and they said this **”Hey man, I’ve been really busy, and I have a lot on my plate right now. But I’ll let you know when it’s good to come over.”** Is that a rejection?
The last time I saw him I went over to his house without telling him I was coming. (**Yes, I know I shouldn’t have done that)** but he wasn’t replying to my messages and wouldn’t answer when I was calling him because I had said something mean to him via text. I wanted to apologize to him in person, so I went over there. When I got there, I walked in on him and his friend talking. I apologized for walking in on them. And he said it was ok and he kissed me after the person left and we fooled around a little bit, so I figured everything was fine.
So then when I asked him if I could come over, that’s when he told me he was busy and that he would let me know when it was good for me to come over. I am thinking about just blocking him because he could just be honest and tell me that he doesn’t want to see me again.
I know we aren’t in a relationship, and he’s not obligated to see me. But I just don’t like the indirectness like if he doesn’t want to see me anymore why doesn’t he just say that? **The last time he told me he was busy I accused him of lying and he said he wasn’t lying.**
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5 comments
You’ve accused him of lying, you said something mean to him via text, and then you wanted to apologize so you showed up at his place unannounced and interrupted him & his friend. I can understand why he wouldn’t want to deal with you right now.
I’m not sure whether things between you and him are over for good, but it’s definitely a good idea to give him some space for now.
You’re not in a relationship…his behavior (ignoring your texts and calls) was a pretty clear indication that he wasn’t interested in talking.
Nobody here can interpret what *he* means. Many people prefer to avoid confrontation, so they will be indirect the way he appears to be doing. It doesn’t sound like this situation is really working for you, so probably choose for yourself and move on.
He’s rejecting you. The reason he’s being indirect is because you come across as kinda crazy – showing up at his house after he made it clear he didn’t want to talk to you – and he’s probably worried how you’ll react if he dumps you for real.
Oh my. You’re a box full of walking red flags, aren’t you?
* Sends mean text to situationship; situationship does not respond.
* Sends multiple texts to situationship; situationship does not respond.
* Calls situationship multiple times; situationship does not respond.
* Drops into situationship’s home unannounced; situationship does not introduce to their guest, does not display any physical affection until their guest leaves when fooling around ensues.
* Situationship later says, “Hey man, I’ve been really busy, and I have a lot on my plate right now. But I’ll let you know when it’s good to come over.”
Yes, you were rejected. Whether it was a nice or cruel rejection is subjective, as not everyone responds to rejections on the same emotional scale. I would consider that an acceptable rejection within the context of a hookup relationship but others may feel poorly treated by it.
You’re trying to hold this person to the standards of a traditional relationship when that is not the nature of your relationship. I don’t know if you caught feelings and became invested or what, but even so, if the other person does not view you/your relationship on the same level that you did, it’s not reasonable to expect them to handle it with care.
Living the hookup life nets hookup results. That’s to be expected and no reason to go into full stalker mode as you did above.
Oh so you’re crazy crazy. Got it.