If you’ve reached out to an old friend (platonic- not an ex) years after falling out, how did it go?

12 comments

1. It’s happened to me a few times.

   We talked and caught up for awhile which was exciting and fun. But, then, it kinda drifted apart again. Usually, I’ve found that we’re either in different parts of our lives or completely different people.

2. I did once. I tried to rekindle a friendship that faded after we moved in with our partners. We kept in touch for a little bit but then I was reminded of WHY we stopped being friends in the first place.

   It was the same one sided friendship that it was a year ago.

3. I’ve tried a few times with friends from various stages of life. At first it was great but the same reasons we drifted apart/ fell out came up again and history repeated itself.

   The one exception was where I let a friendship fade out because I believed the wrong person in a clash. When I rekindled the real friendship (sadly only saw my error when the liar showed their true colours to me) I was honest and took ownership of my mistakes. She understood, forgave me, and we became stronger than ever. She’s going to be my bridesmaid next year.

4. [removed]

5. It went fine. Talked and caught up. Stayed in touch for awhile but was never the same.

6. I have never reached out but I’ve been reached out to by somebody who I chose to distance myself from because they weren’t acting as a friend (ie, gaslighting and other manipulative tactics). I had posted a link to one of my grandparents obituary’s on Facebook and she left a generic “I’m so sorry”comment (as if nothing happened between us). Tbh it was a little weird because we hadn’t talked in 3 years. She has reached out (via Facebook) a few times since but that’s still not a friendship I’d be interested in restarting. I stopped talking to her for a reason that she is fully aware of. There are somethings that can’t be forgiven just because somebody apologized

7. I had a very close friend for years, then we drifted apart. I moved to a different country so contact wasn’t happening even if we wanted to lol.

   Then around 5 years later we met up again, and I realized we were completely different people. No bad feelings, but we weren’t compatible like we once were.

8. I had a falling out with my old best friend. Basically we drifted apart, I was trying to grow up and she was living the party phase.

   Almost a year later I heard she was in a car accident so I reached out. We met up for lunch and she tells me the story of how she got wasted and flipped her car like it was hilarious, while drinking a margarita.

   We texted a bit and I felt bad that a lot was going wrong for her at the time. I wanted to be there for her but I also realized how much I had grown to dislike who she was as a person.

   Then she invited me out one night. Day of, she texted me to confirm and then never showed up. I just never reached out again and neither did she, probably for the best.

9. We had dinner once after we drifted.
   And then just drifted again. I tried to message but never got any response.

10. Good! I’ve reached out to a few.

    I live 2500 miles away, so I never expected much. But 3 old friends I’ve reconnected with are now people I enjoy having lunch or dinner with once a year when I’m in town. One may come visit! They are all women I’ve known since elementary school or high school

    1 other, from college, I’ve only spoken to once. We had a nice phone chat and I’ll text her on her birthday but based on where we live, it’s unlikely much more will come of it.

    But I’m not on Facebook. So I reflected on the people I actually missed from FB and tried to move our relationships to text at least, so I wouldn’t lose them. I’m very glad I did.

11. I don’t even remember what silly reason myself and a close friend stopped talking. About 5 years later, I suddenly thought of her and just had a weird feeling that something was wrong. I sent her an email hoping she had the same email address, asking if everything was OK and if she would mind texting or calling me.

    She called me four days later, admitting she was trapped in an horrible / scary and isolating relationship and struggling with addiction. None of this had been the case when we parted ways. I was able to get some money together and because she lived far from me, send some of my friends to get her out of her living situation and back on her feet. We still text/talk almost every day, 15 years later. I am glad I reached out. She is now married, sober and doing awesome as a floral designer.

12. Depends which one, usually ends after one meeting tho