Should I give him my number?

26 comments

1. He’s a farmer, and farmers are generally tied to a specific area with no real compromise being an option. If you wouldn’t want to live on that farm, it’s not worth getting involved. Other than that, I don’t see any real problems.

2. I vote yes. Seems pretty serendipitous to me.

3. Yes, yes you do!

4. “I’m not looking to try things out or date anyone that isn’t compatible.”

   That’s dating though. The perfect situation on date #1 can be a nightmare on date #17. You just have to make the best decision you can at the time given what information you have.

5. So other than he’s nice you don’t have any positives listed. You will get bored living the farm life. The guy younger by almost 10 years you rarely see so that’s not a positive to me either.

   Sounds like a ton of wishful thinking here and that early works out well in relationships. This is an easy pass for me

6. Yes but make sure you include a ton of sexual innuendos

7. You’re *not* looking to date anyone who isn’t compatible, but you *are* thinking about dating the guy who has major lifestyle incompatibilities (which I’d argue are harder to get over than other types of incompatibilities)? Hmm

   I mean go for it, even if you don’t have another failed relationship in you, life may hand you one no matter what.

   I’d be careful not to over-romanticize this though. It feels a lot like a Hallmark movie and I don’t think people are exactly their normal selves while in the presence of grandparents so you may not be getting the full picture here

8. Yes.

9. I got opinions on age gaps and “opposites attract” dynamics.
   But, dating involves having the mental/emotional capacity for it to fail. So, for that reason, I say don’t bother.

10. I wouldn’t give him your number but maybe a more benign way to stay in touch – social media etc. You never know, but i wouldn’t focus on this one. If nothing else, it was a bit of exposure to potential dating.

11. He must be an exceptionally good-looking dude. It’s the only time I see people throw away their checklists like this.

12. Yes!!!! Life is too short to regret things you’ve not done!!! Go for it! What do you have to lose? Keep dating in the meantime too if you like, you don’t owe him anything. But in the process of getting to know each other you might just realise how much you’ve in common. My great auntie was 17 years older than her husband, they were best friends, inseparable! I had never seen love like that.

13. Give him your number, have a date, and determine where to go from there. Possibly want to lay all or most cards on the table up front, for both yourself and him. If you find you actually are incompatible, you learned something, and maybe only “wasted” one day/afternoon. You may also be surprised that he might be way more open-minded and flexible than you thought.

14. Yes. There really is no harm. He might have had the same vibes and won’t call. If he does, one simple date/meetup is no big deal to verify your vibes in a different setting, away from his fam and out of the hospital setting.

    If you seriously see 100% no chance, then obviously don’t do it, but because you posted here at all makes me suspect that isn’t the case.

15. What happens if he is with you 5 years and then just break up? Nothing, he’ll be 31 and ready to date other girls. What happens to you? You’ll be in your early 40s.

    You have way more to lose than him, so I’d be careful in your position.

16. If it isn’t meant to work out, you will figure that out pretty quick after a date or two, but why not give it a shot. Yea, dating can be exhausting, but it sounds like you aren’t even trying to enjoy the moment for what it is. This sounds like it is worth a try because who knows what he wants for his future

17. Yes! He sounds really nice.

    Also he might surprise you – people tend to behave differently around their elderly grandparents. He probably isn’t quite as simple-things-loving and quiet as he has come across so far 😉

18. Hope you have recovered OP and all is well with your health 😊. Seems to me like you fancy the farmer, so if I were you I would leave him my number and please update us!

19. If you don’t have another failed relationship in you then you shouldn’t be dating.

    You sound like you are doing everything to talk yourself out of this but this age difference is not insurmountable your gut is telling you there’s something about him. So give him your number.

20. It wouldn’t hurt, but I would keep expectations very low. I’ve tried dating people who I had chemistry with even though we had some significant divides in values and culture, and things didn’t pan out for very long. All a matter of how much time and energy you’re willing to expend on what is basically an experiment.

21. Do ittttt

22. If you feel like you’re not compatible, it’s quite simple don’t bother pursuing it. I mean sometimes it’s better to try and see for yourself and you’ll never know truly if you’re compatible or not.

    However, for me, you just know the lifestyle and everything won’t be a match.

    Let me give you an example. I have this friend which I’ve known for many years. I’d be lying if I didn’t “think” about starting a relationship with her. We’re compatible in every way HOWEVER her life goals or her life style in general are complete opposite spectrum from me.

    I’m a photographer and I work in fashion. I tend to like artsy things and being in the city. However for her, although she is technically living in the city, she likes horses and farms. She hates the city.

    Knowing that, without even trying I knew we weren’t going to happen so I gave up on that thought. We’re still great friends.

23. It’s just a phone number and a few dates. We really haven’t seen the ring and the wedding dress yet

24. Hey just stand back deep breath feck the rest of his/ yours and just be mate’s, if anything is real have IT ON YOUR TERMS. Move when your ready .

25. Like Wayne Gretzky said, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take

26. Just do it!