What would it take to get you back if a girl cheated on you?

**serious answers only.. pls read my comments. I did not have sex.

50 comments

  6. Absolutely nothing. *ever*.

    The only people who do that kind of thing are sadly lacking self respect.

  10. Seriously nothing, a good relationship is based on trust, honesty, and loyalty…I can no longer fully trust her anymore. From that point on I’m going to be so emotionally detached from her that there will no longer be a relationship to save.

  11. She would have to fuck like five girls with me while crying in a superwoman suit in the corner and pay for all my cocaine for a month.

  13. There really isn’t any hope to be honest. Cheating is about as low as you can go regarding someone you care about. Typically people who cheat do it and then feel some regret until it is discovered and all of their emotions and regret catch up to them at the same time. The person who discovers that they’ve been cheated on are massacred on the inside whether they show it or not. Obviously it’s a lot worse depending on how long you’ve been together.

    The best bet in all reality is for the person who cheated to begin with to genuinely apologize and for them to work on themselves. They aren’t mature or ready enough to be committed to a serious relationship and never would last in the long run with their current state of mind. We are all human in the end and do make mistakes. That being said, we can learn from them and in certain cases must make some very big lifestyle changes in order to improve ourselves.

  15. Nothing, absolutely nothing. It’s happened to me before. I “took her back” only to get burned again.

  16. I’ve never been cheated on.. But if that trust is broken it’s seriously a deal breaker. I’m married. If he cheats on me, we are done!

  17. Nothing. Even if somehow we make amends and repair the relationship, I would always think back to the betrayal.

  18. even if she went above and beyond to try to make ammends or make sure this wouldn’t happen again.

    he will always live with the underlying fear that she might cheat on him again.

    trust has been shatterred and it won’t ever go back to what it used to be.

    and a relationship without trust is just another tragedy waiting to happen

  19. Nothing. And here’s why.

    I’m open to almost any kind of relationship, as long as there’s trust, equity, and I’m the primary.

    That means you wanna fuck other people? Cool talk to me.

    You want a hallpass? Cool talk to me

    You want to do a threesome with me and your best friend Rich? Cool. Is he cute? Is he clean? Talk to me we’ll work it out.

    We can make something work.

    If you cheat on me it means you intentionally wanted to hurt me. You had every opportunity to get what you wanted and keep my trust but you CHOSE this path. To cause me pain and lose my trust.

    And I consider my romantic partner my foxhole buddy. Me and them against the world. Zombie apocalypse duo. Smash bros tag team partners for life.

    You break my trust, doesn’t matter how hot you are or how compatible the sex is, we can’t be that anymore. I can’t trust you to have my back against the world because you already chose it over me.

  22. As a wise man once said: If you do the same thing 100 times, and you don’t change the variables. Would you expect a different outcome?

    So, unless something really changed with your partner and your relationship, I don’t see why you should get back together.

    Relationships are based on trust. She broke that trust. What has changed so You can trust her again?

  25. Being worth keeping. I am in relationship with a girl as she is, not projecting my relationship expectations onto her. The more person is worth it to me, the more I want to trade my expectations. Being cheated just sets the bar as high as it gets.

    Go back to how things were? Not gonna happen. I was wrong about her, and there’s no going back to these ilusions. She is who she is and I know better now; she may still be worth keeping, but it’s the “new” her I’m reinventing the relationship with. No going back to seeing and treating her like before.

  26. I wouldn’t say it’s impossible but if you truly regret it, you will show it through your actions. That’s going to take loooooong time.

    Personally, it would be over for me at that moment because the trust is gone. I wouldn’t say it’s irreparable but rebuilding it would take a long, long time. And I certainly would not go back to a person who cheated on me anytime soon, even if they said they regretted it. They would have to prove it over time and I would date and maybe be in a relationship by the time the cheater proved they truly regretted it anyway.

    Why do you regret it? If the answer is that the guy you fucked isn’t willing to be in a relationship with you, then you don’t really regret doing it. You just regret that it didn’t work out with Plan A and want to go back to Plan B.

  28. i honestly have thought about this for many years

    and im still not sure there is an answer.

    the problem is the betrayal of trust. so much of a relationship is about the trust that when thats broken its like there is no relationship any more.

    even if it wasnt an emotional attachment they had, the trust part is lost in the same amount.

    if they had an emotional thing as well then that is just an additional layer of self worth being ripped away

    ultimately for me i dont think it will ever work out. i dont think i hold grudges but rebuilding the trust is basically impossible

  30. Serious question: Why did you do it in the first place? It takes two in a relationship, so yeah cheating isn’t exactly the most noble thing to do, that said you did it. Something, when you did it, had the chemicals in your brain telling you that it was fine to do, you ignored all the other ones and gave them priority, so maybe he / she isn’t the one anyway. Life’s too short for settling if you aren’t ready to settle.

  32. Nothing. If I was younnger, I would say – serious love, compassion, apologize, slow rebuild of trust.

    Now that I am bit older (22, so not that old) I have enough self respect. So nothing. Will find someone else.

  33. To the OP: he’s gonna have movies running on a loop in his head of you *in flagrante* with the other dude for the rest of his life. It’ll be better sex than you have with him. You’ll be more passionate in the mental movies than you are with him. You’ll be loving it.

    To the people who say they’d stay for the kids, or do counseling because she just made a mistake: corrosion is inevitable. Just because you can withstand or ignore the pain for a bit, doesn’t mean it isn’t eating you. Your kids will see parents who never quite relax into each other’s company, and think that’s healthy. Your wife will never feel secure or loved as much, and need a lot of strength to avoid cheating again. And you will grow to hate who you are, until you take control of your life again.

    That’s why people here are saying it’s one-and-done. Down that road, if you stay, there’s just less and less of a life for you.

    There’s less and less of **you.**

  34. What does “** serious answers only” mean?

    You think men who are saying that nothing can be done are joking? You don’t wanna hear serious and honest answers, you wanna hear what you wanna hear.

    In one of your comments you mention your ex had texted you for the millionth time. Well fuck, if all this time you’ve been letting your ex creep into your life when you’re engaged (!!!), how the fuck do you expect your partner to trust you? Do YOU think you deserve to be trusted? That’s not even mentioning the fact that you cheated.

    Truth is every single person here who’s answered with “nothing” is dead serious. So am I.

  35. The gaul to ask a question like this highlights you and your morals and how little you think of the man you cheated on. The man dogged a bullet and bless him.

  36. Imagine crumbling a piece of paper and throwing it in the trash. Imagine taking it out and trying to make it look like the original. No crumbles no creases. Yeah, it’s impossible.

  37. No takebacks. I’ve forgiven a cheater before, and she cheated again. That was my one freebie, for anyone ever.

    I’ll never be the perfect husband or boyfriend, but I’m a decent dude. I deserve faithfulness in a relationship I put effort into.

  39. Since you’ve posted this several times, it’s probably best you move on from the situation. What did you honestly expect to happen? Meeting up with your ex while you and your bf are in a weird place is certainly not the best choice you could have made.

  41. Nothing. Trust is earned in drops but lost in buckets. What’s to say you won’t cross that line again? You’ve already shown that you don’t value your bf. I only ever took back a cheater once, and she cheated again.

    Your best bet is to let him go and work on yourself so you don’t make that mistake with the next one. If you can’t cut out that behavior, then you should just avoid relationships.

  42. This is a serious answer- I would have to have a very low self esteem. So I guess you’d have to convince me that I’m a loser and that you’re the best I’ll ever get because that’s all I deserve.

    The only way to abuse people without them dumping you is to convince them that they don’t deserve any better. If that’s how you want to treat the guy you say you want back, then you probably should just stay out of his life for both you sakes.

  44. If my wife cheated in any way physical or emotional or on line. I would never come back ever I would not expect her to come back if I did that to her either.

  46. Nothing. Genuinely nothing. If you break trust like this, give up and move one. There‘s no salvaging the relationship

  47. I’d like to say nothing. But I suffer from low self esteem & have a tendency to go against my best interests. So depending on what state of mind I’m in at the time, probably not a lot.

  48. There is no coming back from that for me, I give no second changes for that type of thing.

  50. Life is too short and everyone deserves to be happy and secure in their relationships. Staying with a cheating partner adds unneccessary stress and drama to life, and it’s always better to move on and maintain dignity and self respect.

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