I’ve been close friends with a girl from Indonesia for several years now. We’ve met online, and the past year we’ve been having daily interactions (text/phone/video), sharing intimate content sometimes and developing feelings for each other.
So, we decided to finally meet up in real life, and spend three weeks holiday together to get to know each other better. I asked her a few times if she really wanted to go through with this, and she wholeheartedly replied yes. I booked my flights and a couple of accommodations, we have been working on our itinerary plans the past week.
Today I suddenly get a phone call from her, 2AM her time. She told me she had something important to tell me. She confessed she is actually married an has a 15-year old kid. Her marriage is poly-amorous, and her husband is okay with her plans. I could actually hear him in the background talking to her.
It was pretty shocking to hear and it shook me up, it’s not what I pictured at all of course. I know we haven’t met in real life, but I definitely have feelings for her. Perhaps I was being naive, but we did express being in a form of relationship together. I told her I am thankful for her honesty and for letting me know ahead of time. It would be even more awkward to find out if I’m already there. I told her she should get some sleep and that I needed to process it, and talk tomorrow.
I’m still making up my mind, but not yet sure how to continue. I was looking forward to my 3-week trip to Indonesia, it’s my first time visiting. However I’m not sure about spending that time together. She told me she wants to go through with it.
It’s a pretty big thing to withhold and I struggle giving her my trust again. I’m not sure what situations I will be putting myself in by traveling together. My ticket is already booked, I could also just have an enjoyable time by myself. What do you think?
TLDR: My friend just confessed having a husband and a son. Should I still go on a holiday with her?