Last night I was out with my friends in a club. I saw a girl that I know for a long time now. She is a few years younger than me and I haven’t ever tried anything with her but she is sooo hot… We said hi, smiled and I went back to my table. an hour later I was in front of the club with my friends, we were coming back in and I saw her again at her table now. At that moment I was hella drunk, I gave my jacket to my friend and I started dancing with her. It was all casual until she turned around and pushed her ass against my dick. At that point I was… I was gassed.. Anyways, I was matching her rhythm and was moving my palms over her ass, legs, belly. And then I went a bit higher and I grabbed her tit for a brief second. She continued grinding me for a few more seconds, then turned around and showed me “no no” with her finger while laughing. I laughed it off cause I was kinda embarrased. A few moments later, her friend was walking by so she hugged her, started talking to her and I just left to my table.Did I overdo it? was that.. too much? I know I’ll see her again somewhere so I don’t know if it will be super awkward and if she’ll think I’m a creep or should I just chill the f out.
tl;dr I was dancing with this girl in the club, she was pressed against me and I grabbed her tit, was it too much?
edit: thank you all for the comments, I’ve read through all of them, but can’t comment any more.. As for the advice, I don’t think I’ll phone her or dm her just yet, but when I see her again, I’ll talk to her. And also, for that one comment lmao, I don’t need drinks to talk to girls lmao. I just haven’t been out for some time and I was having a great time with the boys and it just so happened that she was in the same club
42 comments
id say yes. around the hips and stuff is normal when dancing at a club and stuff. grabbing her tits is just off putting tbh.
Judging by context clues, eh not really
She was giving you sexual signs and you escalated. She didn’t want her boobs touched and made it known to you and you respected that. End of interaction. I don’t see anything anyone did as “wrong”. Don’t over think it.
Edit: for context, I’m a woman.
In this context I wouldn’t label you a creep.
You were mutually playful. Most importantly she expressed a boundary and you didn’t push it.
Be confident when you next connect with her. Let her know you enjoyed dancing with her and that you felt a bit of chemistry / connection. See if she’d be up for an actual date and take it from there.
Its… a bit much but ive been there before in the club with someone where you’re both clearly all over each other. She clearly didn’t mind *that* much, I wouldn’t worry about it
nope, sounds appropriate, she acknowledged and gave you a friendly ‘no no’
You stopped when she asked. You are okay. Obviously ask for clarification from her if you guys are on touching terms, handshake terms, or hugging terms. Just ask her for clarity. If you plan to interact with her some more. Consent shouldnt be over complicated. If she likes you it should be clear whether or not she wants you to touch her.
Reading the title i thought… There couldnt be a no here… It has to be a yes…
Turns out i was wrong… She was riding your Dick with her ass… You stopped when she said no… Nobody pushed any boundries.. she liked it. So no jerks here.
Nah, heat of the moment action given context and she told you no and you stopped. Her friend probably thought so but her opinion isn’t what matters, it’s the girl you were interacting with and it seems like she understands
No, you’re fine. You stopped when she signaled it was crossing a boundary but did so playfully so wasn’t offended. I wouldn’t bring it up the next time you meet though, unless she does. If you are the first to do it might come off as you’re obsessing about touching her boobs welllll beyond the heat of the moment and that IS creepy at this stage lol. If it really bothered her she will let you know, then you can respond whatever way you think is appropriate.
I know it sounds crazy but girls can sometimes be….I don’t want to say naive but not always thinking about how their actions effect men differently. although turning around and grinding with your butt near the dudes dick seems like she’s horny and down to fck, she most likely had very few thoughts of sex on her mind at that moment and just wanted to dance with a cute guy. So grabbing her breast seems like a pretty horn ball move. I could be wrong cuz I wasn’t there and didn’t see the vibe or the vibe of the place you were. I doubt she’s gonna write you off for it But def don’t ever do that again if you like the girl lol. Even when I’m dating someone I don’t want them to fondle me in public unless I ask
Lol. I want to see more responses from women in this one. But I think the main thing that people are appreciating is that you’re conscious about how this could have been creepy.
But I agree with the people, she was grinding tf outta your dick. You made a move, which could have been okay. She set her boundary and you’re respected it by not grabbing them again like a weirdo.
you good bro
Lady here! She was feeling you, you escalated and she set boundaries. No one’s a creep here, you responded the right way. Props to you to thinking about her feelings. Have fun!
A creep doesn’t take no for an answer and also a creep can’t read the signs. I think this was not creep territory but that is just my take on it. I wasn’t there. Sounds like a super hot situation not despite the no and you listening but because you both were playing but stopped when you were told.
No.
Nah she gave you signs so I don’t think you did anything wrong
The teasing finger wag to me comes off as a “not for the dancefloor, maybe later if you play your cards right” kinda thing
A tad too much but i mean it was in the heat of the moment and drinking was involved you should be okay just ask her abt it
Never go for the tits in public, it just looks off and most women find it disrespectful from what I can tell.
Drunk club girls are a whole other creature. She wanted to dance, but that was basically it. I wouldn’t look too much deeper into it than that.
She set her boundary and you didn’t push it I think your over thinking this
You are in the clear as far as I can see. If she lets you know she was upset by it, listen to her and validate her feelings and let her know you don’t want to make her feel disrespected. Doesn’t sound like she was upset though, just setting a boundary.
Honestly I think you respecting her boundaries means you’re the opposite to a creep – she’ll remember that (assuming she wasn’t too drunk) and I wouldn’t be surprised if you’ve gone up in her estimations not down.
In this context, you good broskie… just a tip, next time keep hands on hips/belly and she herself will grab your hand and put it on her chest, if she wants, and lean her head back into your neck.
You responded appropriately. And the finger shaking “no” is, a lot of the time, playful and more of a “not here” or “not right now” than a forever “no”. If she was offended by it, you’d know. But, based on context, I think that you did everything completely fine.
Dude, if you’re into her, give her a call and go out for a drink.
When i read the title , i was like How can you not be a creep ? But after reading , no you’re definitely not a creep 🙂
Happens, you stopped that’s what matters, two adults had thier fun, forget about it now 😊
Sometimes in such situations one or the other over reaches, and the other tells you to stop that’s just how things go.
Sounds like something that would give me the scaries but I think you’re all good man it was sexual you were grinding she’s ok with leg torso touching you escalated and she said no you obliged.. sounds like you did the right thing nothing she might think you were a little too much but I don’t think you did anything wrong. Play it off and jokingly mention how you were both gettin frisky/wild last time when you see her next and I think you’ll be fine. Good luck brotha !
No, you didn’t do anything bad. She said she didn’t want you to touch her there and you stopped. Her friend likely thought she needed saving. That’s pretty common at clubs, where guys get too handsy.
I wouldn’t say you are a creep but grabbing boobs is a bit much in a public setting while dancing imo. I totally get the hips/ass/waist combo, but I can see why she would think it’s a bit weird that you while dancing grab her tits. I don’t think ur a creep, just probably drunk and not very aware at the moment, but I’d suggest as a default to not touch boobs while dancing.
Hips, you grab her hips.
Women are really complicated human beings but also sensitive.. i myself have been groped, boobs brushing my arms or back, my nipples pinched, they showed me their naked pics including masturbating. But do I respond back by touching them? Nah. Unless there’s a clear sign that they want it then that’s when I make a move. Communication is everything for me. Otherwise I’ll play it safe and be cold and sober as a snowman.
I don’t think you were being creepy, but I think you were being a bit naïve. Surprisingly, there is an etiquette to grinding on the dancefloor—you can generally get away with hip-grabbing and _maybe_ occasional butt-grabbing. Tit-grabbing, on the other hand, crosses a line because that’s not even where most of the motion of that style of dance is coming from. Remember, you’re dancing—not having public sex.
You overwhelmed her by doing that she might’ve just wanted to tease in a way I guess
Her flirting and dancing with you doesn’t give you the right away to grab her sexually.
Signed, a woman that is constantly being grabbed sexually without consent.
I had a similar incident in my early 20’s at a club. Girl was grinding on me and was feeling me. I put a hand on her hip. She said no, so I relented. We continued to dance. The fact that you stopped, I say no.
Probably a bit too far, I would also stop instantly when you touch a private suddenly with no warning.
Whenever a woman’s friend comes in to hug & take her away from a guy, it’s because the woman is uncomfortable what the guy did & is too scared to go away so her friends always back her up.
F here. Imo no-because she also grinder against your d*ck and without any cues so..
Now if you continued after she gave you the “no” signal that’s a different story. But it doesn’t sound like you did.
Her friend could’ve comforted her over anything really.
Nah you seem like a good dude and you respected her boundaries. You obviously weren’t off base since you had your dick essentially lodged between her ass grinding. At that point, touching a breast isn’t egregious.