Basically the title. I’ve had a few partners and have never been able to orgasm.
I’ve been seeing one guy for about a month now, and he is amazing. The best in bed so far. He really takes his time, listens to what i tell him, incorporates toys. It feels amazing, but I still can’t orgasm.
When I’m alone i can orgasm no problem, but even masturbating in front of him i can’t.
Does anyone have any advice?
We both feel frustrated because of this.
3 comments
That’s not uncommon! Really. If you’re having fun then make sure he knows you’re having fun and it’s nothing to do with him. Maybe you’ll get there some day, maybe you won’t.
As far as advice I’d try to create scenarios where you can be as relaxed as humanly possible. Whatever that means to you! I’ve found that when a person feels safe, comfortable, heard and prioritized it’s much easier to get out of your head and lean into the good feelings and hopefully that allows your brain to ease up and let the climax come (pun intended).
I have to close my eyes and really focus, I can take 30-45min to build up an orgasm and it’s very intense and satisfying. People with adhd also have a difficult time with this.
My advice would be to practice leaning in. It’s not really easy from the get go for a lot of people! Imagining erotic scenarios helps me. I close my eyes gently and drift a little…let my body move and latch on to the first (or most exciting) scenario that involves us.