This is my first post so hello.
I’ve been stuck in my own thoughts lately on account of quarantine and everything else that’s been going on lately, and it’s forced to to over analyze almost every aspect of my life. Although I don’t have a bad life by any means, I feel that I’m lacking in different aspects of my life. One of those aspects being that I don’t have any friends and I think I’ve never really had real friends.
I’m not saying this as in people just don’t like me for some reason. For context (if it matters), I’m now a 25 y.o., single, grad student. Growing up, I’ve dealt with my own insecurities and as a result, I often pretended to be someone I wasn’t. So in high school, at work, or at any social gathering, I’ve always been a version of myself that I thought people would like, and that version would often change depending on the group I was around. Looking back on it now, I guess I would’ve considered myself a “floater” where I moved around different friend groups in order to “make as many friends as possible”.
As a got older, of course, I grew out of this way of socializing. I still deal with my own insecurities but now I realize that I don’t have to compromise myself to get people to like me. However, now I realize that since I haven’t been authentic to the people I’ve ever considered my friends, people often times forget about me? Like friend groups that I used to be in still connect with one another but often times don’t invite me unless its a big social gathering (like a birthday party).
The fact that I don’t have any real friends itself isn’t what’s bothering me though. I grew to be introverted and enjoy my time by myself most days (plus I have sisters and I’m close to my parents). But I do feel tho that I messed up creating genuine connections with other people. I do go out with acquaintances , but I can’t think of anyone outside my family that I feel comfortable hitting up whenever or when I need someone to talk to.
Now that I’m more comfortable with myself, I want actually try to make real friends that share my interest and what not, but not I feel like its too late. Well, I know it hard now because of corona, but even before the pandemic I really didn’t know how to meet people that I’m not in undergrad, I work, and people are getting married and starting families.
My question is how do people in the mid to late twenties make new friends (if they do at all?) My grad cohort is small so I’ve meet most of the people in it and I work. I want to become part of local groups but I don’t know to get connected. IDK, I feel that everyone my age already has their set friend groups.
TL;DR: 25 y.o has no friends and I feel like its too late to make friends. Sorry for typos, I don’t feel like proofreading.
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Edit: Hello again. Just wanted to thank everyone who shared advice and their experiences. I didn’t think I the post would get as many responses as it did. I’m reading all the feedback and replying when I can. Just wanted to let you all know that I appreciate the support!