Sorry, I usually dont really love asking for advices, but this time I’m gonna do it anyways since I really could use some.

A few months back, I had a crush on a girl of my college. Took my courage in my hands, and went to talk to her. I couldn’t believe it, but everything was going smoothly : We got along really well, she found me funny, intelligent, asked me a lot of questions about myself, laugh at everything I said, would sit next to me to classes… She even straight up told me she would rate me a 7 or 8. She gave me the impression of being a really kind, open-minded and positive person.

Then we got separated for a month because of the exams. And when we met each other again, things were different : At first I was a little bit nervous since we didn’t see each other for a long time, so I would come as more distant. It seemingly made her a little bit uncomfortable and someone told me she thought she did something wrong/thought she was akward. So she started to avoid eye contact, and also to avoid me.

I understood that she wasn’t interested anymore and even though I still had feelings, I decided to start treating her as a friend.

Thing is, since I’m a pretty engaging and open person, she seems to thing I still want to flirt when it’s clearly not the case anymore. So when we talked to each other again, but it just wasn’t the same. She would always ask questions about myself and stuff, but she laughs far less often ( even less than with other people ), avoid eye contact and even If I dont think she hate me I would say she tolerates me at most. For exemple when I told her Yesterday that I enjoyed talking to her again, she would laugh in an almost mockingly manner and tell me ” Thank you ” with disblief and without even looking at me.

In short, that’s an uncomfortable situation and I really want to get out of it. The thing is, we’ll have to see each other pretty often anyways and we’re friends with the same people , so we need to resolve this situation.

Part of me want to straight up ghost her from now on. But there’s another more prideful part of me that really didn’t like the unecessary mean and cold manner she treated me and feel the need to talk to her about this, and also to make all of this situation clear once and for all. But I know she’s going to avoid me if I ask her to talk in private, since firstly she hates confrontation, and secondly she’ll think I want to confess or something.

And even If I hate saying this, even if I feel really pathetic admitting it… There’s always a big part of me that loves her and I suffer a lot from this situation. I really don’t expect anything anymore, and I’ll respect her decision anyways, but she didn’t have to treat me like she did, that’s harsh for no reason at all. And honestly even if I know I got to move on, and trust me, I try to do so, I just can’t forget her old attitude and the good times we had together. It’s really painful

What should I do in your opinion ? This really isn’t a fun situation to live

TLDR : I got along well with a crush and we flirted a lot. Made me feel really good, but she started to act coldly and harshly without a reason. What should I do ?

2 comments
  1. I’m really confused – do you like her or not? Do you want to get to know her or not? I honestly have no idea what direction you wish to go in after reading this post. She was “mean” to you, because she didn’t think you liked her because your attitude towards her changed and… what? I don’t get what you want to happen?

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