I am a 65 year old female. I have an older sister, older brother and two younger brothers. Recently my youngest brother told me that our mom told him my other younger brother has a different father than the rest of us. My mom and dad separated for a short time shortly after I was born. During the separation my mom had an affair with her old boyfriend and my brother was conceived. I am not sure if her boyfriend knew he was the father. My brother also told me my mom said my dad knew he was not my brothers father, although he raised him like he was. My father passed away 37 years ago. My mom started dating the old boyfriend again after my father’s death. The boyfriend passed away a few years later. Shortly after my mom’s boyfriend’s death is when my mom told my youngest brother about our brother having a different father. The boyfriend never married or had any other children. My mom passed away over 15 years ago. I am not sure why my youngest brother decided to tell me now. I am pretty sure my other siblings do not know. My youngest brother was very close to my mom and they lived together for quite a few years. That is why I think she told him. Should I tell my brother who his father was or leave it alone? I would want to know, but maybe it would hurt him and I don’t want to do that. Growing up I never would have believed my dad was not my brothers dad. My husband said he would want to know for sure. Please give me your opinion. Thank you!
Tl;Dr My brother does not know who is his real father. I recently found out. Should I tell him?
3 comments
Definitely tell him not telling him and him finding out some other way would hurt him even more
Tough one. I would say yes probably. He should know if for no reason other than medical. Just my two cents and I’m really on the fence about it.
It’s been so many years since your parents passed away. I would tell him. I can’t see any harm coming from it. He may already have wondered at some point.