My bf is 5’5 and I am 5’6 and 28M/F. He has in the past said that he feels uncomfortable when we are out and I wear heels that are too high a long time ago but agreed that he would work on his insecurity and I can wear what I want.
I used to model and love fashion, these days I make good money but work in a male dominated environment which has it’s challenges and looking pretty makes me feel cute.
I know the tricks to buy comfortable enough pairs and wearing them makes me confident. I do sometimes wear heeled boots in the snow even in winter.
My bf always complains but claims that it is not about his height, he might say they are too noisy or act concerned that I might fall on the snow, that heeled sandals to work was inappropriate and might attract unwanted attention. They are real issues but ones I can live with, I have always had an attitude of not caring about harassment directed at me and just living my life, sure it might suck getting cat called, have pervs take pictures etc but I do not care anymore. When I told him this he said, I want to be promiscuous in my male dominated office. I take my career seriously and while I might be girly, I am highly well regarded on my team and I make more than my bf.
Once my bf broke one of my shoes with a hammer when we had a fight about something.
My birthday was coming up and I had hinted that I wanted a particular pair of boots, and he bought me sneakers, which are not even that useful right now as it is winter, and he got cheap ones which are slightly too big.
I got quite angry with him and told him he had short man syndrome, he also got angry and said that he was over his insecurity about height and that I am weaponizing an old issue.
TLDR: I like wearing heels, my bf used to be insecure about his height but now finds other reasons to complain about them like being promiscuous at work and safety.
8 comments
Sounds like he needs to be single. Breaks your shit when mad? That’s absolutely never okay.
My lady and I are both 5’10. She could wear stilts or flats and I’ll stand by her side. Go date a man.
He shouldn’t have dated someone bear his height if he was self conscious about being shorter than them in heels. OP you are doing absolutely nothing wrong. Our style is how we express ourselves and our identities, and wearing heels is clearly a major part of yours.
You should sit down with him and say something along the lines of, “Wearing heels is something that makes me feel good about myself, and it makes me happy. I’m not hurting anyone or doing anything wrong. It feels like you’re using me potentially falling and the noise as an excuse for me not wearing them, and I will not let you control what I wear.”
You two may not be compatible if this is a major issue. Also OP, him destroying your property and using a hammer is violent and unacceptable. Major red flags.
Girllll… if it’s still an issue, how can he say he’s over his insecurity? He does not get a say in what you wear. End of discussion.
I would think hard about why you made this post. He doesn’t sound like a catch? Do you see this relationship going the distance?
> Once my bf broke one of my shoes with a hammer when we had a fight about something.
This is not a man you or anyone else should be in a relationship with.
Break up with him, then you can wear heels as often as you want.
Is this the only concern you have about your relationship? Somehow I doubt it.
I say leave him if he’s that self conscious about his height to the point he takes it out on you and breaks your things especially if they make you feel good while wearing them