How to deal with the rejection of being blocked

10 comments

1. Yeah, desperate and clingy is not a good look, especially around new friends.

2. I would definitely lean toward apathy with people as opposed to desperate to hangout. Be like it would be nice to hangout or not, whatever is good. If you’re too interested and eager it can put people off.

   I might be wrong I just noticed that people don’t like it when you’re giving off anything remotely desperate.

3. People want to be wanted, not needed. You being in need of friendship is all about you and has nothing to do with who THEY are as a person. No one wants to be that.

   Stop pushing for the “idea” of friend or partner. Focus more on actually getting to know people and seeing if you vibe well. You’re working backwards.

4. You pushed them to admit that they think you’re weird? Yeah, that would make anyone uncomfortable regardless of how they actually felt about you before. It sounds like you need to work on your insecurities

5. I don’t understand how you think smoking weed with someone you don’t know is going to forge a strong friendship. Whatever connection you think you formed while baked isn’t likely to be the reality while not high. Find people you can be friends with without the immediate need to introduce mind altering substances.

6. There have always been people in the world who, at the first sign of attachment, of actually caring about another person, disconnect. Post-Covid that number is sky-high, and it’s the exact opposite of what needs to be happening.

   You can’t do anything except cope and keep trying.

7. You come off very desperate and clingy which is why they separated themself from you.. You need to work on that. Smitty and others explain it better below though.

8. ‘Trying to convince him to let me smoke with him’ he’s going to get overly clingly and desperate vibes. Forcing someone to admit your weird, is in itself, very weird and most people would run a mile even if they didn’t think that of you in the first place, they do now.

   Sounds like you should spend some time working on your self esteem and your own values before going out and making any more relationships.

9. Why wasting your time and energy like this?!

   Learn not to take others plans and promises seriously!!

10. Why would you try to get him to tell you that you’re weird? What purpose does that serve?

    If someone was pushing me I would not tell them that even if were true. It would be unfair of the asker to push, it would be labeling me as judgemental and give me the idea that they didn’t trust me to enjoy their company on my own terms. Whether it is true or not that you are weird, that guy was choosing to converse with you and potentially hang out. Let people make their own minds up about you. Don’t try to put words in their mouth.

    And yeah, like others have said, you may need friendship but you need to come to it in a way that is fair on those potential friends. You cannot demand it of strangers and acquaintances. For example, it’s been a good 5 months since I agreed to play some D&D with some other locals and we’ve only just mutually this week come to the point where we can admit that the main point of the D&D group is that we waned to make friends so suddenly we are doing non D&D activities together. But for one person, D&D was all they wanted so they aren’t joining in and that’s okay! That is their choice.

    You aren’t the only one with needs and feelings in this situation my dude, and you gotta take care not to cross anyone else’s lines.