I 25F have been with my partner 37M for around 15 months now. We live an hour away from eachother and due to work we only get the opportunity to see eachother at the weekends. We plan on myself getting a job in the area he lives, and living with him and his parents whilst we look for our own place to live. The problem is, we haven’t done anything sexual in around 6 months now. I’m getting increasingly sexually frustrated and I’m beginning to feel quite emotional about it. Sex is never initiated, and every time I hint at doing something sexual, he doesn’t take me up on the offer. I’ve told him that we’ve gone too long without sex, and he agreed with me. He then explained that it’s hard for him to get in the mood because of his family being around. I personally don’t understand that, as he has his own bedroom and privacy, so nor his mum or dad would have a clue if we do anything sexual. I was worried that he is having sex with someone else at first, as that is the only reason I could have thought of. I’m now quite certain he isn’t cheating, as I haven’t noticed any signs that point to that. He leaves his unlocked phone around me all time, I haven’t noticed any suspicious patterns of him going out, etc. I just don’t know what to do anymore, I’m feeling pretty stressed about our sexless relationship right now. It hurts because we get along so well, and there is plenty of closeness and intimacy between us when it comes to cuddling and kissing.
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Since a substantial number of guys would have sex in the back seat of a car in the far corner of a shopping mall, a bedroom with a door would be a welcome opportunity. It could be that his sex drive is diminishing (it happens to a lot of guys). There is a subreddit r/DeadBedrooms that talks about it. Or it’s just possible that it really freaks him out to have sex in his parents house. Not all guys are so horny that they will have sex with a girl who’s church pastor father is sleeping ten feet above the couch where the carnal delights are being practiced (not saying I ever did that, mind you).
So tell him you are thinking of being just a bit wild (re: noisy) and perhaps when you are in town the two of you should get a room at the Hampton Inn (their walls seem exceptionally thick). That takes away the freakiness of practicing procreation in the very place he was created. Bring along some coconut oil for a full body massage. The whole exercise will help determine if he is adverse to sex or just gets weird about being within a stone’s throw of his parents.