Okay, so I (25m) have never dated before. I’m not scared to talk to girls as I actually have quite a number of friends who are girls and can make conversation with people, but I just have NO idea how to take it to the next step. So there is a cute girl in my class who I like and would like to go on a date with or hang out outside of class, but I have no idea how to get there. I only see her once a week and I finally talked to her for like 20 minutes after class about school and movies and music. My problem is I have no idea how to move it from small talk to asking her out. I mean I have a crush on this girl and have no idea if she has a crush on me. She isn’t necessarily giving me any hints that she is because I was the one who started the conversation after having class for about 3 weeks together, but I’ve heard girls don’t make the first move most of the time. After the Conversation we just say see you next week and that is that. But how do I move it from peers to possible date? Do I just straight up tell her I think she’s cute and we should hang out? I am worried if she says no the rest of the year in class would be awkward lol but happy to hear advice about dating in general because this is something I struggle with no matter the girl.
Edit: I’m reading all the replies. Even if I don’t reply, thank you all for the comments!
11 comments
hey fam, that’s pretty common, i’ll try to help you
that’s great, you did the right thing small-talking to her, i’d try to be flirty making her laugh, treat her like a real friend, mocking her sometimes, telling a few jokes and always being confident, that sounds repetitive but it’s the true, if you believe in your words she’ll, the best thing is to make a friend but don’t be scare of the “friendzone” to avoid it, leave some hints that u would smash her, but don’t be crystal clear, that direct approach will kill you, when it’s about “seducing” someone try to be vague and appeal to her emotional, if you are rational it won’t be good.
and ffs use this knowledge to make her happy
>I am worried if she says no the rest of the year in class would be awkward
That’s the risk you run with every date invite. Just do it. Take the rejection on the chin if it happens.
What kind of class is this if you’re 25? Are you in graduate school?
just said “ let’s go to the movies” They either say yes or no and there you have it it.
Maybe you could ask her if she would like to meet you for coffee or something. If she agrees, ask for her number.
If she declines an invitation to meet up, that’s totally okay. It’s her choice and it doesn’t need to be awkward. At least you will have given yourself a chance by asking her out.
>Do I just straight up tell her I think she’s cute and we should hang out?
Literally yes. Don’t make it a huge thing. If she says yes, great! If she says no, she says no and you can just continue to act normal around her. You can’t control all the awkwardness, but you can control yourself acting awkward or not, which is half the battle. And the less awkward you are, the less likely she is to be awkward.
Also (and I say this with all the love in the world) please do not take Reddit dating advice too seriously or depend on it to dictate your dating life. That includes my advice btw. There’s some good eggs here but there’s also a ton of bitter dudes. A great source for dating advice might actually be those female friends of yours!
It doesn’t
In my experience it’s always a no if they don’t show obvious interest, so I’d be wary. But good luck!
Nobody is born with the dating manual in hand. Many of us have made mistakes figuring it out along the way.
Just ask her. And if she says no or gives you anything other than a clear yes, which probably just a “nice”no, don’t take it as a sign to try harder. Just move on. I know it might feel like it, but It’s not a big deal. My other piece of advice would be suggest a clear plan. Don’t just say “hey wanna go out some time”. Something like “hey there’s a cool even going on tomorrow, want to
Go with me” or “maybe we can have dinner tomorrow night”. That way if she’s interested she can say “I’m busy tomorrow how about Friday”. If she replies with something vague like “I’m pretty busy the next few weeks but I’ll let you know” that’s probably a no and I’d just leave it be.
Dating can be a confusing and challenging experience, especially if you’re new to it. Here are some basic tips to help you get started:
Be yourself: It’s important to be authentic and true to yourself when dating. Try to relax and be confident in who you are, and don’t be afraid to show your personality and interests.
Be open-minded: Keep an open mind when it comes to dating and try not to have too many preconceived ideas about what you’re looking for in a partner. Be willing to consider different types of people and try new things.
Meet new people: The best way to start dating is to meet new people. This can be done through social activities, online dating, or through mutual friends.
Communicate: Good communication is key to a successful relationship. Be clear and honest about what you want and what you’re looking for, and listen actively to your date’s perspective as well.
Take things slow: Dating can be exciting, but it’s important to take things slow and not rush into anything too quickly. Get to know the person you’re seeing and take the time to build a foundation of trust and respect.
Be respectful: Treat the people you date with kindness and respect, and be mindful of their feelings. If you’re not interested in pursuing a relationship, be honest and direct about it, rather than stringing someone along.
Remember, everyone is different and what works for one person may not work for another. The most important thing is to be true to yourself and to have fun while you’re dating. Good luck!