After 9 years I’m leaving a mentally abusing relationship, she just broke up with someone for the same reasons, neither of us have given up on love yet, so we decided to get together but take it slow. When we are alone the tension is so intense that it feels uncomfortable, I try holding her hand and after 60 seconds she lets mine go for a make believe itch, silence is on our lips most of the time and I fear this may not work. It may be too soon or it maybe too late to love anyone else ever again for both of us, I don’t know?
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Unless you’re both in some kind of therapy it’s too early and you’re going into a double rebound situation.
Seriously, if you came from abuse you need help to navigate out of it, even after you’ve left.
Eww…how old is your oldest daughter?. And is she your daughter’s friend?. What would your children and family say when ypu are seeing a woman half your age?.
You want to have young children again in your 50’s?.
Or you are simply looking for sex with young woman, with no strings attached?. Anyways, gross.
You shouldn’t monkey branch relationships, especially if you’re leaving an abusive relationship. That being said, 30 and 52 can be in totally different life stages. For example, she could want more kids in the future.
There is so much info missing from this post. Why is being alone uncomfortable? Where is this tension coming from? Anyway, the 22 yr age gap probably has nothing to do with it.
Ew. Leave her alone. She’s probably grossed out to be holding hands with someone her dad’s age. She’s vulnerable after leaving an abusive relationship and you’re taking advantage. Go away.
Nothing is a waste if you enjoy it. That’s my view on life. Give it a shot, she’s a consenting adult, you both met as adults so it’s not all that weird. But she did just leave a relationship and it may be to soon for her to move on. Give her time to come to terms, and give yourself time to learn who you are outside your relationship too.
There is nothing wrong with an age gap relationship if both parties are happy and fulfilled. Reddit tends to look down on them but if you’re in sync and of age there’s nothing morally wrong with it. Women have historically gone for older men for financial security and a good relationship is what you make it.
That said if you can ignore the judgement of outsiders I think the biggest hurdle you’ll face is the fact that you’re at different life stages. Your preparing to retire and she may be thinking of having a family.
I don’t think you have anything to lose by going for it.
Given the background of abusive relationships you both experienced therapy might be a good idea too. Good luck!