We’ve been seeing each other for a few months now and I was expecting for him to ask me out for Valentine’s Day, but he hasn’t. He did text me happy Valentine’s Day and told me he’s lucky to have me but didn’t ask me to see him or anything.. I’m disappointed should I tell him how I feel?

32 comments

  1. how often do you see him? if you are ‘just taking’ then does that mean you are not really dating? and if not then why are you upset?

  6. So tell him Valentine’s Day is important to you? For many people it’s just a Tuesday. He may think I’m seeing her this weekend so I don’t need to do anything on the actual day?

  7. Amazed you two hadn’t discussed it before today. Seems odd to me to not communicate things like that.

  8. It’s really unfair to be annoyed with someone not meeting your expectations when you haven’t informed them of said expectations.

    He’s not a mind reader and you’re capable of suggesting plans yourself.

    Take some responsibility and initiate the next meet up.

  9. You have nothing to lose, ask him if he has any plans today and if he wanted to do anything together with you for Valentine’s Day!

  10. I mean, you could have asked him?

    I’ve been seeing a guy for a week and had to cancel our third date on Friday, so I asked if he wanted to come over today instead. He said yes. We’re sharing a bottle of wine, charcuterie, chocolate, and cuddles in front of the fire. 🥰

    Relationships and dating should be an equal effort. It’s not all on him to make moves and plans.

  11. I’m so over these ‘ I expected social media influencer standards for Valentine’s Day and all I got was this text ‘ posts.

    It is ONE day. Out of 365 that you have to show you love someone. Make plans. Make an effort. If you need a mass commercialised media circus to show your other half ‘ cares ‘ about you then you’re all in the wrong relationships.

    ‘ expecting ‘ is the key word I’ve seen in literally ALL of these posts. Don’t expect shit. Communicate !

    And most of them are all relationships under 12 months long. When love language and personalities haven’t even been figured out properly yet.

    Get a grip. Tell him you want flowers on this specific day of the year because social media says you should buy them or just move the bloody hell on.

  12. You literally answered your own question… Why are you here?

    So many questions here could be answered by simple talking and communicating with your partner.

    Also, he might not be into celebrating this very commercialized holiday. He might not know how you feel about it so he should’ve asked and you should’ve told him you expectations instead of assuming he can read your mind.

  13. It’s just another day. Why do people feel the need to follow what society has told them to do on Feb, 14th. Forced gifts, chocolate, and cards.

  15. You said you are talking to him which means you guys may not be in the level yet? Is it a situation where you guys are in different levels in this situationship?

  16. Why don’t you make some plans? Valentines day is for both men and women and unless you discussed it prior, it’s not only up to him to do nice things and make special plans. If you are always relying on him to take the first step and do things, it will get tiresome for him. You can even ask, ‘we should spend the evening together at my/your place and have dinner’ etc.

  20. Seems you guys aren’t exclusive so there’s a very real chance he’s just on a date with someone else

  21. Some ppl dont really celebrate it? It is kinda old fashioned and cliche. He prob assumed you wouldnt care or expect anything other than a simple note

  22. Some people dont celebrate made up holidays. If its that important to you then let him know instead of telling internet strangers that you dont know how to communicate.

  24. Have you defined the relationship? Are you exclusive or are you still just casually dating? It could be he had other plans.

    How did you two manage Christmas gifts and expectations? Since it’s only been a few months, it would have been reasonable to ask him, last week, his preference for these romantic holidays, and explain yours.

    So, you really have no reason to be upset, in that sense. I understand you’re hurt.
    I am a woman, btw, if that matters.

    For me, Valentine’s day means nothing and we don’t celebrate it, even tho it’s the anniversary of when we met.
    Neither of us are emotional or romantic sorts, so, we might have a mention of “remember when” and that’s about it. Not everyone thinks these are worth anything more than a word or a card, or maybe not even that.

    Communication is key in every aspect of building a new relationship. He said something very sweet and meaningful via text, and I’m guessing that was a genuine sentiment. If that isn’t enough for you, talk to him and express your needs. Either he can and will try to meet those needs, or he won’t, and you’ll have an indication there that you two may not be compatible.

  25. You probably should have communicated prior that Valentine’s Day was a day you wanted to spend with him. I thought my guy was working so I showed up at his house over the weekend with gifts, he ended up not working today so he’s been showering me with gifts and is cooking us dinner. And it’s only been a month of seeing each other.

  26. Sweet Jesus. If you did not use your mouth to say it was important to you, how was he or anyone else to know? Most people know today exists but doing coupley things can be an expensive nightmare so they plan around it like it’s an average day. Use your adult words to tell him, or better yet, ask him out. Your partner shouldn’t have to read your mind.

  27. I don’t think it should all be on him to plan things out. Two people are in a relationship, no mater whatever labels are being used, and it shouldn’t all fall onto one partner. What did you plan/prepare for him for the holiday?

    You could have communicated in advance that you’d like to spend the holiday together and make plans. Open communication is very helpful when it comes to meeting expectations and being on the same page as your partner.

    Not everyone is into the holiday. It’s not a gender specific thing either. I have male/female/non binary friends that go all out for it and also aren’t fussed over it.

    I’m not trying to get into gender politics either, but it shouldn’t all be on the dude to plan out “romantic” holidays. People of all gender identities deserve the same effort their partners expect of them.

    There’s nothing wrong with expressing your emotions regarding how things played out, but I think phrasing should be important.

  28. “Hey would you like to do something valentines day” “Got any plans?”

    Communication is key. Don’t assume people know what your thinking.

  30. Why don’t you ask him? A lot of guys don’t realize that girls care about these things at all.

  32. Wow, men really do have to initiate everything..

    Does he know you like him too?
    Do you do anything for him other than just have sex with him?

    If you can’t even communicate with the guy you’re with, then what is the point lol

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