I’m an introvert and I really appreciate the time I spend daydreaming and analyzing everything internally but this would lead to me forgetting to control my expressions and some people would sometimes ask me if I’m alright which doesn’t bother me because it almost never happens.
That is until I met this classmate one year ago. We would only talk during recess time and at first everything was fine, sometimes I’d be a bit immersed in my thoughts and she would ask me if I’m alright to which I answered that I was ok.
The problem started when they moved my seat next to hers, which was fine because I enjoy her company until she started asking me “U good?”, “are u ok?”, “is everything alright?” everyday, every single time I don’t talk to her or smile.
I know her intentions are good so I feel bad for feeling this way but seriously, this makes me think that I must really look so bad when daydreaming or that there’s something wrong with me.
This happens not only when I’m quiet or not smiling but also when I’m trying to pay attention to the lessons at school since I like to attentively listen to the teachers so I guess I must have the same expression because she also asks if I’m ok.
I’ve tried to mention how I suck at controlling my expressions while daydreaming and how I felt a bit uncomfortable when people would ask if I’m ok while I’m all good but she believes that I’m overthinking (with bad thoughts) but that’s not true, Do I have to smile all the time for people to think that there’s nothing wrong with me?
Is there a way to tell her to stop asking me that everyday without being rude? I honestly would let it be but it’s starting to make me feel out of place and insecure and that’s not fair since she’s only concerned about me.
2 comments
I would just say you don’t have to ask everytime I’ll tell you if something wrong not only is it telling her to stop in a decent way it should also insert a more trustful relationship if they trust you enough that you’ll tell them if something wrong I believe that’s all free to dm me for more advice
This is HER problem, it has nothing to do with you. You don’t have to always smile or talk or act upbeat. BUT. She must have been around people who didn’t communicate when they were actually upset (with her!) and she developed compulsive need to verify. Please, remember at all time that it’s her internal struggle and discomfort that’s making her ask. If you really care about this person, then consider having a heart-to-heart conversation about this, but you may also have to accept that her own insecurity will keep her prompting to ask again.