Recently while trying to get intimate with a girl i noticed i was having trouble maintaining/getting an erection. I’m 18 years old, exercise regularly and eat well. I’ve always had a high sex drive and could get aroused easily.Recently, i struggle to get a fully hard erection or getting aroused when i want to be. I used to watch a good bit of porn (stopped a week ago) and would masturbate 1-2 times a day, sometimes even 3. Ive been talking to a girl and it’s getting pretty serious. It’s making me anxious thinking about not being able to get an erection while about to have sex with this girl. Any tips on what I can do to fix my libido and my erections?
6 comments
I think it might not have to do with arousal. Maybe you’re a bit too anxious about not getting hard which is making you not reach it. It happened to me once with my ex , i got soft in the middle of the action because I got distracted and couldn’t get hard again because I lost concentration. Next day when trying to get sexual with her i was way too worried to not get an erection that physiological speaking casued me to not be able to have an erection. Don’t think about it too much , distract your life with your own stuff. You’ll end up forgetting in some days and everything will be alright
It can be difficult to find local men’s health specialists in many areas, but you should try to check if there is a men’s health center near you.
Otherwise, try telehealth as that is a good option for men who lack local access to specialized care.
“It’s making me anxious”
I suspect this is your issue. Try your best to be in the moment. Stress and anxiety can be erection killers.
You said you stopped porn. Maybe lay off the masturbation too. If you do continue to masturbate here or there (this is just my own opinion) fantasize about your new girlfriend.
Definitely don’t rush into PIV sex. Explore all other “lesser” options, touching, oral, etc. Maybe don’t even get completely naked. The idea is to be comfortable when you are with her….to take some of the edge off. Slowly ratchet up over time.
I’d say your root problem is the porn. That’s led to anxiety of performing to that TV or fake standard. Thinking of performing leads to more anxiety couple with all the masturbation. You’ve set yourself up for failure.
Many end up needing some professional therapy to overcome this.
For starters- stay away from porn, quit maturating so much and when you find yourself with your girl I’d focus on her and her body and how seeing feeling her turns you on. From there I’d focus on the moment and forget about trying to be a porn star. Just be intimate with her.
Yup the first time I had sex I couldn’t get fully hard LMAO, it stopped after a couple more times and being more comfortable, don’t be ashamed of it