Plz don’t make fun of me but I’ve been in a relationship for three years and it was my first long term relationship. I’m pretty sure it will be ending soon and I’ve been out of the dating scene for so long that I don’t even know if it’s possible to find the man I’m looking for.
I’m looking for a man who is intelligent, works out, loyal, and honest. But I really want a man who won’t like/save other girls posts who are being suggestive or just overall almost naked. I want someone who is very patient, preferably with no anger issues. Someone I can learn from. Honest to the point that, if he does cheat or talk to another girl, he will feel the need to tell me (I obviously prefer someone who wouldn’t cheat in the first place, but ya know). And doesn’t want kids. Preferably not overally religious.
23 comments
That kind of man exists but he’d be super desirable on the dating market and most guys like that are probably in relationships or they’re patiently looking for exactly what they want.
It’s good you know what you’re looking for though, be patient, try to offer the things you want in a partner and you’ll find him.
How difficult it is to find a man like that depends entirely on what you’re actually bringing to the table.
You aren’t even out of this relationship and you’re looking for the next?
Work on yourself and take some time to be single instead of branch swinging.
Possible but not probable. What woman wouldn’t keep a man like that?
Also, you’re expecting so much from a guy. Do you have all the qualities that a guy like that would want from a girl?
Sorry, Overly religious here.
your -100 karma is setting off my bullshit detecting antenna.
I mean, sure that kind of guy exists in romcom movies.
you have a bunch of oddly specific shit in there, that makes you sound angry and bitter.
Sounds like you need to break up with this guy and spend some time on you.
some of what you asked for is ridiculous and over controlling, other shit seems totally reasonable. 🤷🏽‍♂️
Girl, this is like… the bare minimum of what you should expect from a guy. Minus the no kids part, that might be harder to find. And what do you mean you’d prefer someone that wouldn’t cheat in the first place but “ya know”? Like they just can’t help it?
Based off what you’ve said about your last relationship and how little you seem to expect from a partner, take a break from being in a relationship. You should love and respect yourself a little more. You deserve more than expecting to be cheated on.
I dont have social media but I work out rarely.
Normally, a guy who works out REGULARLY is pretty active on social medias
In terms of intelligence, if he says he is intelligent, then he is less likely to be that because he convinced himself he is intelligent and theres no need to change or to improve
its hard to find a guy who is both intelligent and regularly works out, even if you do ‘find’ one is in the middle between this 2 extremes
You either find one who is intelligent or one who works out
So Id say its pretty difficult to find this kind of guy.
I’m currently dating the man you are looking for. Not giving him up either! Best of luck
My view:
It’s always possible to meet a high quality man if you possess some fantastic qualities. If you are intelligent, read widely and can converse on a range of topics, you have the right attitude, and you have a loving feminine nature then you can attract a strong, balanced masculine man.
You have to tie off loose ends in your current relationship and learn how to flirt or practice your seduction skills so that a man can approach you and ask you on a date. Go well.
I’m supposedly intelligent, and loyal, and I guess if you call oversharing inner thoughts honest, I’m honest.
But god damn am I underweight.
Out of curiosity what would you do if your man liked a random post on instagram of a lady in a bikini?
Not hard if you are willing to put in the effort to find one.
I would consider myself in that that group. I took a leadership class in college where we had to determine our top 3 values. Mine were loyalty, honesty and integrity. I also graduated summa cum laude from a big ten school, so i might not be a genius, but I was intelligent enough to do well with effort. I’m generally super chill about most things. I really like being active in various ways. And I’m Cf non-religious.
It shouldn’t be a surprise that people hangout with people like them. In fact, because those values are so important to me, if someone else doesn’t value the (is a cheater for example), I don’t think I could even carry on the friendship. So I hangout with other guys who have similar traits to me generally, so I know there are plenty of us out there and many of us are single.
The thing is, a lot of us also just kinda mind our own business. We’re not the fuckboys approaching you at the club or trying to make every meetup event into a singles meetup event. The ones who are romantically assertive have probably gotten themselves into LTRs. So you are going to have to put in the effort to find us, not the other way around.
Edit: this is not an advertisement to message me lmao. Just trying to provide my perspective on the question.
Edit2: like someone else said. You aren’t even living the values you want which is a HUGE turnoff. If you don’t want to be loyal to your current BF anymore, the the relationship. Trying to strategize how to replace him while you are still together isn’t very loyal.
You have quite the list there.
But nobody can give you a reliable answer or even educated guess at your chances when we do not know what you would have to offer such a man. You will understand that if you are yourself a 60 year old, 500lbs man living in some basement, your chances would be significantly different from when you were a 25 year old woman. You get the idea – we cant assess how well you match with the man you described.
You want all of that, but cant leave your current relationship before? The man you are describing wouldnt give you a second of his time. What exactly are you bringing to the table?
Hard question to answer. Speaking only for myself, I only saw dating leading up to marriage. That marriage was to create a family. A family means children. But in my case the woman I married couldn’t have kids, so supported her dream to adopt. I have no regrets.
To enter into a relationship and marriage with the intention of no children may prove risky should either person change their mind years down the road. I know of one such case that lead to a divorce so the guy could find a younger partner to start a family with.
In your situation are you willing to adopt. Just something to think about as you are dating. As it might increase your chances to finding a partner.
Best of luck to you.
This is easy. Start working out at a popular gym. Everyday. He is there one of them most likely older already had kids.
You want someone who doesn’t look at other women that are attractive lol. Better make sure you don’t have any male friends and don’t like any other man’s posts, or your just a hypocrite. Good luck with that in this social media age.
You’re talking about a dream man that mostly doesn’t exist.
I read your criteria and as I was reading, I actually tick most of those boxes. But then I read your last point about doesn’t want kids. That excludes me.
You are falling into the trap of most women and aiming too high. You can’t get 100 percent of what you dream.
Aim for 85 percent of that and don’t be so picky!
There are high value men like this- but the question is obviously:
Are you high enough value that he wanted you, instead of everyone else.
Plenty of men that fit the bill, I just fear that if you chose someone who’s bad for you that you’ll do it again. History tends to repear itself. Take a break from dating and focus on yourself, once you did that then go out there and meet people and don’t be afraid to make the first move.
lol I don’t know why guys here are acting like this is hard to find, everything except the kids part is not that dificult
but im curious, what is intelligence for you? a lot of people believe if you don’t have a degree then you are not smart, but intelligence can be emotional, social, creative or even in your sense of humour