I had a friend who became obsessed with me and stalked me for over a year and tried to kill me several times during. I know of at least 2-3 other girls he did this to after me. I ended up having to move and isolate myself completely to stay safe, he will still try to associate with my social circles so I will check back on his socials every now and then to see if he’s talking to anyone I know for safety reasons. Nothing has come of this fortunately, however I noticed he frequently reposts and responds to a female streamer. I mean like it’s almost all of his posts. He will comment share like all her stuff some of it borders sex work and he’s buying her merch. That’s no problem good for her I’m glad she’s able to garner a fan base. However I feel like it’s almost dangerous for her considering his history. She’s a queer woman and so am I and the last 3 girls he stalked/harassed. He is a cis, straight man, I don’t understand why he keeps stalking queer women. Because there’s been multiple victims and he will drive long distances to do things like slash my tires to keep me dependent on him for transportation and stuff I feel the need to warn other women. And while I don’t feel he will ever physically hurt her, I feel uncomfortable knowing she’s in a position where he has that kind of access to her. I don’t know if I should send her a message and be like hi this is random and you don’t know me but my violent stalker who targets queer women is one of your extremely active followers. Or if that’s too much and I should just let sleeping dogs lie. I am a gals gal and I feel like I should warn someone when a stalker who has a history of insane violence is following them so closely on socials. But again idk if I’m being dramatic and will just look crazy to her.
TL;DR My stalker is obsessed with an Internet personality who is similar to his victims. I want to warn her but don’t know if it’s a good idea.
7 comments
Warn her, there is literally no downstairs to giving her a heads up. Maybe nothing happens, maybe you save her life.
How could it be a bad idea?
If you do it anonymously to keep yourself safe.
Do the Police know about all this?
So he’s tried to attempt to murder you 2-3 times and he’s not in jail? This post doesn’t make sense.
Are you working with a lawyer? Do you have proof he did this or could this end with him coming after you for defamation of character? Were there ever charges? Are things relatively stable for you now and, if so, is there a chance he could find you based on this and/or that his behavior towards you might escalate and disrupt that stability?
The right thing to do, in a vacuum, is, of course, to warn her. That said, he’s going to keep doing this. If not to her then to someone else. It’s, of course, helpful to her know his history. It’s true that action from you, should she believe you, will likely help her out *and* (this is the hard part) it’s also true that you’re going to want to think about your own safety first. It’s going to be awfully hard to go through life warning every woman he targets and, it’s not going to stop him (he’ll just move on to other prey).
So sure, warn her, assuming you take appropriate precautions but also keep in mind that if she chose not to listen, to decide you’re “crazy,” or even to tell him that’s her choice and that, even if she successfully blocks him, you’re probably going to see this pattern repeated each time you check his socials.
He’s tried to kill you multiple times but you don’t think he will hurt her? He’s tried to kill you multiple times and isn’t in jail?
????
Warn her, obviously. The hell?
My house is burning down- should i call the fire department….