I’m gonna go ahead and say it first, its kind of silly, but it still affects me.
About a year ago i was dating a girl i was 22 at the time and she was 21. I personally felt great chemistry between the both of us and i developed a huge crush on her back then. All of our dates went really well and stuff
I wont tell the whole story since it’s quite long and honestly, not even i get it. But one day, we agreed to go on a date, and one with fancy restaurant and everything. I call her that day to confirm we’re going, but one thing led to another, she sort of stood me up after she confirmed she was going to the date, and i traveled and hour to go to her house, and while she tried to explain to me the reason, it was super weird (again, long story, unless someone wants to hear it, and trust me it makes no sense). I asked for a raincheck and she never answered my texts.
She never blocked me since i can see her online to this day, and for whatever reason she has kept me in Facebook.
It’s been a year, and i don’t have feelings for her, but it still hurts that she never replied or elaborated on the reasoning of what the heck happened.
Should i ask her about it, to try and get some closure? I’ve never texted her once since then, and i originally planned on keeping it that way, but i feel that im not getting closure.
5 comments
Most times, any answer you get won’t help with closure. You have to find that yourself. But there’s no harm sending her a message saying you still don’t really understand what happened. You’re not trying to start things up again, but you’d appreciate some clarity on why she stopped speaking to you.
Don’t send her any message. The closure was her standing you up. She indicated she wasn’t worthy of your time. Have some self respect and move on. Don’t send any message. That’s just desperate.
It’s extremely rare to get closure from someone you’re in a relationship with let alone someone you were barely dating. She already told you the reason, which in your own words “was super weird and made no sense.”
But this is the short of it. She didn’t find you attractive. She didn’t see a future with you. The fact that you felt chemistry and developed a crush is irrelevant. That feeling was one sided. Bottom line is she was not interested and moved on. You should take it at that and move on yourself.
Never ask for closure. It’s weak
i wouldn’t personally ask. I’d just remove her from facebook and such so you don’t have that reminder. If things were going well and you’re sure you didn’t do anything crazy I’d bet money she simply met someone else and didn’t feel the courage to tell you the truth/ break it off.