I’ll explain better.I have almost no friends at school.I just speak to three people everyday in class and for the rest of my classmates i am so shy i can’t open up.But when i am at home i am a whole different person.I have such a dominant personality and gold humor (mostly with my 2 year younger brother) that i feel like the cool kid you see everyday in school:confident,funny and cool.
When i am in school is the exact opposite.It feels like i completely forget how my personality is and all my behaviours.I am just sitting there like a bean.Barely talking to the three people i usually talk to.I have a little bit more friends from other classroom wich i speak to but it’s the same story.I just cannot use the dominant personality i have at home.When i talk with them i show almost no emotions and i don’t seem an intersting person.
Now let’s begin with a more analitic part.Why this happens in my opinion.
(1)I am unconfident:
Not making dobuts about this because i am sure that i am uncofident around other people.I am just thinking if this could be a factor.Maybe i am scared of using my personality around people because i am scared they’ll male fun of me?
(2)When i am in school i think too much
Should i speak to him/her?How could i approach someone today?Wich is a cool way i could walk?How can i get longer conversations with that guy?
When i am with my brother i never think like this and i get good conversations and i have that strong personality i love about me.
(3)I am impressed about seeing strong personalities like the mine when i am in school
Not saying that my brother has a weak personality but for sure he is educated and acts more calmly and less crazy than me (don’t know if i have explained well).When i am at school i see strong personalities like the mine in my classroom and i am not abituated by seeing strong personalities like the mine at home and i am unconfortable seeing that i am not at the center of the group.
I am just thinking about how cool and amazing it would be to use the personality i use with my brother and family also with my friends and start opening up in class.I am almost sure that my personality would be one of the best in my friends group…..if i only knew how to use it outdoor.Does anyone went trought this.Why this happens?How can i use my home personality with my friends?
2 comments
The main point is that you are afraid of judgement. It’s easier to be outgoing and confident when you are in your comfort zone. Furthermore, your brother may idolise you /hold you to high regards which is why it is easier for your extroverted side of your personality to come through. Your classmates treat you as a normal guy and hold you to the same standard as the rest. This is why you overthink and your social anxiety comes through. Your personality is only strong when you are you in your comfort zone and that’s the main issue. You need to put yourself in places with peers your age and attempt to show a more extroverted/outgoing side of yourself. That way you will be able to achieve what you want.
Oh my gosh this is how I feel too! At home, I’m normal & I can easily have normal conversations with my family but I school, I become a robot with no personality. I feel like all the months that go by, my childhood is being wasted. I don’t know if this happens to you but my body also becomes kind of stiff & tense in public.