Help I’m a nervous wreck! First date in 2 years!

5 comments

1. Try wearing clothes.

2. It’s perfectly normal to have nerves like this, especially after a couple years. But try to relax and remember this is just another person who is surely nervous themselves. You’re looking for a partner, someone you’ll be around *a lot* – what’s there to be afraid of? You’ll either be going out with them many times more, or maybe never seeing them again. Point being, you have nothing to lose by just enjoying the moment. You’re going to be perfectly fine. Just be yourself.

   And forget about being “bailed on,” unless this person has given you reason to worry. Just be sure to confirm the date tomorrow several hours before you’re supposed to meet to make sure they’re still good to go. Have fun tomorrow.

3. What makes you think you’ll be bailed on? Has he / she confirmed that they’re going? Maybe try to plan an outfit today and then it takes the pressure off tomorrow. Lay out some clothes that you feel your most confident in and try to put some good music on while getting ready to ease your nerves beforehand. I usually get ready and have a gin and tonic (if you drink) just something to take the edge off. And be yourself! At the end of the day if they don’t like you it’s their loss- well done for putting yourself out there again

4. First off, calm down girl! Do not give a stranger this much of your mental energy and emotions. Slow down your brain. I would have low to zero expectations getting back into dating. Do not put any person on a pedestal to the point you haven’t even gone on a date and feel like you need to throw up. Nerves are normal, but try not to get too much inside your head. Value yourself. Notice red flags, ask questions, separate reality from feelings during the date and after. See how they make you feel, if they ask you questions, if they seem like they have good character, find out if they may be a good match for a second date. Just because you go on a first date doesn’t mean anything has to progress. You get to decide that by going on the date. A first date is an introduction. Like an interview somewhat, just tempt to see how it goes first. Doing start the rabbit hole of expectations. Notice the reality and take it one step at a time. You will be okay. And if you get bailed on then F that guy!! Obviously not the one for you!

5. Remember this is supposed to be fun. From the feelings you’re conveying it makes me think you’re a good person.

   If that guy/girl doesn’t get that then fuck them. Your guy/girl is out there somewhere. Be brave and don’t sweat it. You got this!