What are those little moments in life with your significant other that make you think: “Yeah, they definitely love me.” ?

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1. when I have a meltdown and he stays by my side no matter what (bipolar disorder)

2. When he questioned accepting his dream job because he wanted to make sure I was comfortable with the decision first

3. Middle of the night ice cream runs when I feel grumpy.

4. My partner knows me really well. For example, today, we were at an art store and he showed me some gouache from the expensive brand I like for cheap. It was on sale because it had been lightly used. He knew I liked the brand, he knew I’d likely want the item, and he was excited when I got it.

   He does this a lot. He’ll send me links to activities, songs, youtubers, books, video games, etc. that he’ll know I’ll be into. He knows I love easy farming games like Stardew Valley, indie-pop songs, cat gifs, cocktails with mezcal or beets, and slice of life fiction novels. He knows I’ll love a documentary about Abercrombie and Fitch, a local subscription box for specific wines, or a cute Calcifer (from Howl’s Moving Castle) sticker for my laptop cover.

   I love when he calls me, excited, and says, “hey, I heard “*blank band or comedian*” is touring, do you want me to check for tickets?” He has done that more than once. He’ll know if I have a bad day, we may need to go out for dinner and drinks after. He knows what I won’t like, too. It’s very obvious he loves me because he gets me and is willing to try things I like for me.

5. Recently I flew home after being away for several weeks. He picked me up from the airport and when we got home he opened the door to the backseat and pulled out a bag (I didn’t smell a thing I swear). He had went to our favorite restaurant before he went to the airport and got these gyros that we absolutely LOVE… was so nice to get home late and not have to cook and get to eat the tastiest gyros I’ve ever had in my life! That’s LOVE!

6. when they say “i love u” always ofc. but also when he shows physical affection i feel the most reassured. and i guess how he expresses how much he wants to be with me and spend time together 🥺

7. When he got me a butterfly necklace. I’ve been with him since 8th grade, and we both grew up poor. He sold snacks during school and I thought it was because he was saving for college. It’s Easter, next thing I know, he put the necklace from behind and whisper, “I love you.” I still have it and occasionally wear it to this day. I say occasionally because he’s gotten me other things over time.

8. When he feels bad he can’t take off work to be with me on doctor visit days and I have to go alone. He texts me the sweetest things, like movie quotes to encourage me and to remind me he loves me and is proud of me.

9. This happened with my ex, but it was really nice.
   I was taking my last final to graduate. It was for an intense math course. Math of any kind is not my strong suit, so I was so anxious about it. After I came out of the building, there was a note stuck to my windshield that said something along the lines of, “You’re going to do great. I love you so much”. He had taken an early lunch from work to go put that on my car. It’s truly the little things.

10. In the back seat of the car on a trip home from visiting family for Easter. I wanted to lay down across the seats and put my head in his lap. He stroked my hair and kissed his hand and then put it on my forehead since he’s tall and couldn’t reach by bending down. After a bit he picked up our switch to play some zelda so I thought I was going to be in the way. I asked if I could stay where I was and he said “yes, please do.” My heart melted a little bit at that. He then let me sleep on him for over an hour and drool on him without complaint lol. He’s a keeper.

11. when they look me in the eye and take a deep breath. I can’t say much. but my partner and i have been through so much trauma, and eye contact is such a hard concept between the two of us. We’ll be laying next to each other watching tiktok or talking about their friends or just little things that make them happy and they’ll just stop mid sentence and look me in my eyes and take the deepest of breaths with the most beautiful smile on their face. Idk, just those little moments, for me tells me she loves me and listens to me. I feel safe.

12. That little smile when I kiss him goodbye before heading to work.

13. When he resuscitated me.
    And how he puts up with me on a daily.

14. When I fart while we cuddle and he pretends he didn’t notice ❤

15. When he offered numerous times to financially support me when I was going through something and we weren’t even married.

    I turned him down immediately every time, I value our relationship too much to risk taking money from him. He has the best heart in the world, and just because I know he would do anything in the world for me doesn’t mean I’m gonna let him. 😛

16. I have a surgery coming up and we’re long distance. He has all his PTO for the year allocated by like, January. I assumed he wouldn’t be able to make it and wasn’t concerned (not like I’ll feel up for much interaction, why fly out to watch Netflix on pain meds instead of flying out for quality time?)

    He called me back a few days later to ask if it would be easier if his flight was Tuesday or Wednesday before the surgery. He’s taking the day off to drive me and will be here for two weeks.

    I already knew he loves me, but damn if he isn’t the best.

17. It’s those little things sometimes. Like he knows that food is really important to me and that I get hangry so he’ll always make sure I get fed even if he’s not hungry or in the mood to eat.

    I went on a date with this guy once and he wasn’t hungry I kept hinting at him that I wanted to eat and he just kept saying he wasn’t hungry and I wanted to strangle him.

18. Today I was just standing there with the baby in my arms and my husband was doing something else, he randomly stop, looked at me and said “you look really pretty” I just said “okay?” And then he went on to tell me why he thinks I’m pretty…my heart melted ❤️

19. You know all the stuff men do for their pregnant wives, like late-night ice cream runs and foot massages? That’s just normal life for me.

20. She does my hair in the morning regularly, even if I do not have to leave the house. Curls upon curls. It feels very intimate somehow.

21. He will put his arm around me first thing in the morning after waking up.

    Random compliments out of the blue, that I know are genuine.

    Catching him smiling at me.

    Once he carried me back home on a forty five minute walk when I sprained my ankle and couldn’t walk on it. This was when we were still friends and not yet dating.

22. It’s little, but I love falling asleep to the TV on (I know, I know…) and he doesn’t. He encourages me to choose something to put on every night (this is after we’ve had an evening together and are now ready for bed) and arranged for a timer on our TV.

23. When I’m really busy with something (exams, work project, etc) he always offers to pick up extras tasks to take weight off my shoulders. He’ll cook dinner and clean it up, put my laundry away, etc. I don’t even have to ask. I try to do the same for him when he’s got a lot on his plate.

24. I had to work 12 hours on a Saturday today to finish a report. My fiancé made this fantastic cheesy bread that he knows I love from scratch so I would have a treat to make the day less shitty. He’s the best.

25. Sometimes when I am half asleep and my husband thinks that I am in deep sleep, he just kisses my cheek, ear, forehead, shoulder, whatever part of me he can reach without waking me up. Its mostly a single kiss sometimes two but it just makes me feel so special. It has no fixed pattern. Its sometimes early in the night, sometimes in morning, sometimes when I am taking a nap. But it happens all the time. There is no reason too. I think he just looks at me and goes like here take a kissie. I am pretty sure he does this more often when I am actually in deep sleep. He thinks its his secret but I haven’t told him yet that I know. You know I don’t want to break the magic.

26. My boyfriend and I got back together recently, and it has brought up my insecurities of trusting others and feeling like I’m not good enough (trauma from being a daughter of immigrants). Anyways, as we walked home after dinner, he was exasperated that even with my job and benefits, I still can’t afford to pay the copay for therapy. He then offered to cover a portion of the copay. I was truly touched. He wanted to invest in me! His way of showing love for others is givung gifts and I felt that he fully accepts me for the imperfect person that I am. It is I, who needs to accept that I’m not perfect and I’ll still be loved! He wants to emotionally invest in our relationship and improve our communication, and that’s the committment, reassurance, and act of love I’ve been looking for. It was that moment when I felt safe to envision my future with another person. It took me so long to get here and I want to share my growth with him.