I always used to struggled with my confidence and would avoid conflict at all cost and was a people-pleaser. Over the last year I’ve been trying to work on myself and I think it’s really starting to make a difference.
Went to the bar with 4 friends last night (21/22m) and was playing some pool when one of my friends hit the cue ball off the table. The bartender (maybe 30?f) then asks for a dollar for hitting the cue ball off the table, it’s bar rules. My friend (I’ll call him C), who’s been watching way too much Andrew Tate, reluctantly pulls out a dollar and tries to make the bartender walk over to get his dollar because he thinks it’s some “alpha move”. Other friends and I start to call C out for not walking the dollar over when he says “I’m not gonna walk my money over to some b-“. I then call C a b-, eventually the bartender walks over to grab the dollar bill, and C gets mad and walks home. After 30 minutes the rest of my friends and I walk home. At some point I hear a conversation in the other room where C says “I just don’t like being called a bitch” and other friends consoling him. I immediately walk over to put a stop to it and tell him he WAS being a b- and how ironic it is that he doesn’t want to be called that but is fine saying it about an innocent bartender. He gets mad again and goes to bed.
I just wanted to share the story since it’s the first time I’ve ever put this much strain on a friendship, but I don’t feel bad about it at all
5 comments
Keep that energy.
My guy.
You did society a favour and imo are being a real friend
Wow when I read this post I thought you were like a ten year old. Dude you’re a grown man.
So here’s the thing
Tate has giving a tremendous amount of fantastic advice: definitely an overall net-positive if you pay attention to what he tells men to do **downvotes incoming**
The problem is that people take what they want to hear while ignoring other equally important aspects
If you’ve listened to a lot of Tate, then you’d know that in his own podcast, he says outrageous things because that’s what grabs attention. The problem is the people who can’t differentiate this persona to how he actually treats people. Tate conducts himself in an incredibly respectful way in public. He’s very polite to staff, waiters, etc
What we with your friend is a case of him taking Tate’s confidence as his own arrogance. When Tate is screaming shit down his podcast, it’s because he can back his own shit up. What your friend is doing is saying shit without being able to back it up, while being an asshole in public.
You won’t win him over by bashing Tate, but rather calling him out for not being truly like Tate.
Now this may sound cringe to you, especially if you dislike Tate, but the only way you will change your friend’s behaviour is to expose him for not following Tate’s principles in the first place.