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I matched a girl on tinder and went on a total of three dates with her. She has been giving me mixed signals throughout.
Our Face to face meet ups were all great, we talked non-stop, asked each other more deep questions and even shared stuff about each other that I felt were very personal (not something you would share with any random stranger). We had good eye contact and neither of us were distracted by anything. We gave each other our full attention and I thought we had good emotional connection even though we did not had any physical touch in any of the dates.
However, in between those dates, she either replies really slowly or she won’t even reply my texts, and I’m the one who initiated all 3 meet ups. She also don’t show much interest in my life through texts (she do ask a lot of questions face to face) Most recently we were texting until she stopped replying my messages again.
On our previous date we mentioned meeting up today for lunch but she said she needs to check her schedule and get back to me. Nothing heard from her at all. But I know she’s alive and happy because she posted on IG on how she spent her day at the museum, cafe etc.
I guess I’m just emotionally drained right now as this girl does not seem to be that interested in me after all. We did have good interactions face to face and she also agreed to meet up / search for more activities to do together. However she never ever follows up whatever she said she would.
Now I’m not even sure if I should ask her where she thinks this is going, or is she already sending a clear message that she’s just not that into me? Why won’t she just tell me directly that she’s not interested, so I don’t have to keep wondering to myself what exactly went wrong
Serious dating takes a LOT of hard work- and occasionally, it pays off!
Currently struggling pretty hard with the scarcity mindset. I know you’re supposed to fight it. But when you look around at your experience on the apps, doesn’t scarce sometimes feel accurate? In this moment, it feels like anyone who could have been a good fit is already taken.
Had a very enjoyable second date with some pretty good physical chemistry earlier today. Felt natural and easy to be close with her.
Will have to make a decision soon between her and another woman I’m seeing, both 2 dates so far.
Started a session with a new therapist to look into my avoidant attachment issues. I’ve had decent success in dating but I’ve had some mental block in committing to a relationship when that’s what I want.
We went over my childhood, dating history and experiences. I told her about my lack of emotional closeness with family and friends. She kinda ignored that and felt I was dating the wrong type of woman. She felt I should be more specific in looking for a partner and suggested I put in my OLD of what characteristics I’m looking for. I hate it when profiles have those since they’re so mundane (like who doesn’t want a partner who’s ambitious?). She’s way older than me (probablys 50-60s) and OLD is probably different for her demographic.
I just didn’t connect with her, I’ll probably try a new therapist.