Ok, reddit please please please help :
I (female, 29yo) met this guy (34yo) on bumble. We texted for about a month and he asked for my number and then he wanted to meet. We agreed to meet on Thursday.
He suggested to meet in a city that I oive in (45 mins of drive away).
But the work week turned out to be absolute insanity and aldo i forgot I’m about to have my period which left me barely alive on Thursday.
I texted him apologising and asking to reschedule for Sunday.
He said it is fine and asked if I can come to meet him in his city instead.
What do you think? Should I go?
Would me going cancel out thr fact that I cancelled Thursday date?
Or should a guy still come to see a girl where she lives?
I still feel a but dizzy so not sure if I should go…
Problem is I used to be the one going the distance so now Im really scared of someone using me.
Tl;dr should I(female 29yo) travel to another city for a first date with him (male 34 yo) where he lives. Or should a man be the one to go the distance and travel to where the girl lives first?
7 comments
Ideally, a man should be willing to travel to you.
If this isn’t possible, make a compromise with him.
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Well, you cancelled which is a slight inconvenience to him. I think it’s a fair trade if you having to travel now is a slight inconvenience to you.
Don’t overthink it. If he seems nice, just come to his city.
He might have prior plans that he can’t cancel on last minute, or something else affecting his logistics.
If he’s a dick, you can always leave and it “only” cost you 1.5 hrs of yr time. If he’s worth it, next time he’ll travel to you.
you can do either way that is convenient for both of you , but just meet in public place, and don’t give in to the excuse that since it’s far, you have to stay at his place.
you can totally make other plans, but pick whichever plans you’re comfortable with.
Sure why not, men are supposed to do absolutely everything right?
He was willing to come to you, you cancelled and now he’s asking if you can compromise…why is this an issue for you? It literally makes no sense what you’re saying
You mention you’re scared of being used…that’s a you problem that you need to address, stop punishing men for something someone else did to you; If you can’t then you’re not ready to date
I think it depends.. are there more things to do where he is at?! Is there a cool plan set up by him?!
I’ve driven 1 hour for a first date, but this guy had planned a scenic drive from his hometown, had a reservation at a reindeer farm, where I could feed baby reindeer, so it was totally worth it!!!