I had like 7 close online friends. 3 have lost touch with me. 2 of them said it was for mental health reasons, one is busy either with school or their irl friends. It’s usually good when I message the former 2 and ask them to watch movies/play games, but during chatting they leave the conversations suddenly.
Back in high school, I had 1 friend group kick me because of being “anti-social and too quiet”, among other stuff such as asking too much questions about them. Started hanging out with other classmates, they also stopped wanting to talk to me after they got close to that old friend group that kicked me. Then I met another friend group that was nice to me at first but then one of the members started taking extremely long to respond to my messages (like we’re talking up to 1 month even), and while they do invite me to stuff, it always gets very difficult when I have to invite them (either they say that they have work or that their parents said no, especially that 1 member).
Now I am attending a course associated with IT and recently I invited 1 classmate to go to a bar during the weekend. Well the classmate did say yes, and then at the course we were like friends for 2 days. But today it was like normal acquantainces again. Plus, during group projects I rarely get credits for my work from that classmate (while others do).
Am I the problem here? How do I fix not being able to get closer to anyone?
2 comments
I’m wondering how the one friend group kicked you out for being “too antisocial and quiet” but also for asking too many questions about them which would be the opposite of being quiet. What kinds of questions were you asking? It could be that you were getting too personal with them too quickly. Also what do you normally say before your friends leave in the middle of the conversation?
First of all, you need to know that it doesn’t necessary mean that is a problem with you. Not everybody is meant to be with everybody. That’s why we like some people more than others. And maybe the people you just met were not the right people for you 🙂
Because you can’t really change anything. You talked to them, tried to become friends and sometimes it just didn’t work out. That is absolutely normal.
I would try to find some friends with similar interest… then it’s almost always easier to build a connection 🙂