I can’t speak for men, but as a women, if I see a man that lists anything related to his type on his profile I will swipe left.
“I want an alt/emo girl” “i want a muscle mommy” “where are the tall/short girls at” “bonus points if you’re blonde with freckles” “I like girls with tattoos” etc. etc.
Even when I fit a type listed I’ll swipe left. Everyone is entitled to their type but listing it out like that can seem objectifying.
And if a women doesn’t have the exact features/type listed, even if you’re interested in matching with her, she’ll likely not feel good enough and swipe left.
And a lot of these features/types you can figure out by looking at their profile so mentioning them on yours is unnecessary. And even if it’s something you can’t figure out, still expect to get less matches.
36 comments
I agree with this. I see a lot of this on hinge especially under the “I’ll fall for you if” category. Always “if you’re blonde.” I just swipe left because I don’t fit that and it just sounds really shallow.
Even with the guys who said “if you’re ginger/redhead” (which I am) I was still put off by it.
Honestly on the tinder/bumble/hinge subs I’ve seen women do the same thing but it’s “if you’re 6 foot.” I know a lot of guys, even that are 6 foot, are put off by that.
Those people just come across as very shallow.
I wouldn’t. But I think the guys who listed those types are very likely being swiped to the left by me whatsoever hahaha..
Agree, even if I match that type I’m swiping left. It’s a major ick. Like dude just swipe right on the people you ARE attracted to lol
I agree. Same goes for any MBTI or astrology bullshit. Those ones don’t have the same “shallowness” ick but people will use them as an irrational grounds to disqualify you. One would have to be a fool to list them.
So, instead of listing out our requirements, it’d be better to just tell people who we are?
“I only date (insert race)” wonderful…then only swipe on them 🤦🏻♂️
Yup same for dudes…certain things I see in profiles I swipe left automatically.
Any mention of height requirement, she calls herself a boss babe or princess/queen
what about personality type ?
Agreed, your bio is to convey your personality not list your type and requirements (unless those make up a substantial part of your personality).
Just as an off comment from the other side. About 1/3 to 1/2 of women list their type or a list of requirements in their bios.
The goal is that my type would match with me. So if you’re not my type why would I care if we didn’t match?
I get where you’re coming from. Honestly I think this attitude comes from a desire to (consciously or subconsciously) assert power in the relationship. If a person is mostly concerned with what they want and will make sure you know it, then it’s fair to conclude they are focused on themselves primarily rather than on getting to know someone and their uniqueness. So yeah, I’d totally swipe left.
The only time I accept it is when someone puts a preference for a personality trait. For example, “bonus points if you’re spontaneous” or something like that
I never tryed/bumble or hinge are they good dating apps
I’m 63 years old and looking for a Asian woman around 58 to 65 years must have high sex drive l live near Sacramento Ca I find that women with a higher
sex drive like to cuddle and hug more than normal woman
Looking for the Pam to my Jim ✨
Women are the worst offenders with this actually. I guess guys aren’t allowed to have preferences. Also nice revenge fantasy I guess, rejecting guys who don’t want you must feel so vindicating.
As soon as I see “I only date black guys” I’m swiping left. Might even just close the whole app and take a nap
Women read what men have written on their profile.
They always want latinas
I list the personality traits that i look for. I still get dates.
You should see the shopping list on some womens’ profiles.
For the other guys in this thread….
The trick is to describe the type you are looking for indirectly through traits that you already have. Say you want that emo girl. Then maybe highlight the parts of your personality that have connected with emo girls in the past (listening to band x, enjoying x activities, etc.) and be genuine with it. Don’t lie about your interests but be selective about sharing the ones that will attract the type of women you like
edit: speling is hrd
IDEK why I’m here I don’t get matches
“If you mention your “type” on your dating profile you’ll likely get significantly less matches”
You’re right about the less attempt you make to screen people out the more options you’ll have. However, *screening people out* is often the intention of listing one’s type.
Women do the same thing as men when it comes to listing their “must haves” or preferences.
Dating profiles are often like want-ad postings listing qualification requirements for the job.
It’s not uncommon for a woman to state she prefers to date men 6 feet tall or taller.
It’s also not uncommon for a man to state he prefers women who are fit and in shape.
Almost everyone specifies the age range they will consider.
One person’s *preference* is another person’s *shallowness*.
Some people are fine with having less matches if it means *weeding out people* they feel would be a *waste of their time*. The irony is if a man thinks *you* are “hot” he’ll *ignore* your *wish list* and pursue you anyway! 😂
Lots of women scratch their heads and ask: “Did he even *read* my profile?” 🤣
Listing what you’re looking for makes more sense than listing what you don’t want.
I’ve seen some women put the following in profiles: “No players, liars, or cheaters.”
As if a so-called “player” who is attracted to them will read their profile and say to himself:
“Awe snap! She ain’t got no love for *the players*. I guess I better move on to the next profile.”
Seriously??? 😂
Most people you meet don’t become dates, most dates don’t become relationships, and most relationships don’t lead to marriage. As one adage goes: “Many are called but few are chosen.”
***”Dating is primarily a numbers game…. People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That’s just the way it is.”*** – Henry Cloud
Best wishes!
Women do it too, or jus have no bio, or jus their ig handle.
Dating apps jus suck.
Thankyou for your voice!
I mean if one is on the apps (me), it may be time to rethink “your” type because it has apparently not been successful thus far….ijs.
I just put something dumb cause I can’t explain everything easily and no one cares to read it all anyways.
So like rn I have “sometimes I look in the sky and don’t think about anything it just looks cool”
But I’m stupid so idk
Less matches, but surely the point is to narrow down the list to someone with traits you’re after.
What’s the point of having dozens or hundreds of matches, that aren’t a good match, or even result in a date?
I see a lot of dudes in my area putting that they want an adventure partner who wants to travel with them around the world/country etc.
Sorry, I am not going to change my lifestyle to fit someone’s expectations so I just swipe left. But I believe most women are turn off by men who put the “adventurous” trope, even if she loves it as well.
I feel like they write things like that to direct interested in themselves or who they are.
I don’t need a guy just to have fun. I wanna a real relationship with real strugglers and boring days. But I feel like most profiles I encounter are all based in this superficial aspects of a partnership that they can easily do with their buddies. Makes no sense to me.
And most of the time, the relationship doesn’t sustain.
This “pinky” life makes me think the guy is more interested in someone to have fun and as soon as problems show up, he will just leave you.
Personally, in my bio I have “if you’re darkskin with waves, I’m hitting that super like” but that’s it for preferences. I understand I might get less likes (I haven’t but I think it’s because I’m a female on tinder tbh) but I’m okay with that, filters out my non preferences. No skin off my back. I still swipe on guys who aren’t my type and match with them. Sometimes they bring it up, but then I just say, “well I didn’t super like you”. And that’s it.
No pics of you = next
Photographers = next
Type listed = next
School of hard knocks = next
I feel like listing one’s type that is not based on appearance (ex. “I want someone who values self improvement”) is okay but yes, appearance based types is off-putting, especially when it mentions race.
I (f24) kinda agree with you but also I feel they might as well show who they are yk?
Happily, my type is “guys who don’t use dating apps”.
Yeah, agreed. Even if it’s like “bonus points if you mountain climb” I swipe left, because I do not, and therefore I’d be a disappointment.
This is exactly why I don’t mention that I’m looking for 6 ft, college-educated, career-driven man on my profile. It’ll just scare them away! 😅