How do you interpret “strong and independent woman” on dating profiles?

31 comments

1. If they actually write that shit, that’s a red flag.

2. If you need to state it, you’re telling yourself and not me.

3. off putting, insecure, combative

4. High chance of being delusional/obnoxious/insecure. Not because strong independent women are so rare, but it’s like the female equivalent of a guy putting “Alphamale Gigachad” in his profile.

5. She can bench press a car

6. Probably a pain in the ass who assumes that any negative reaction to her attitude/personality is due to intimidation and not the very normal human tendency to dislike people who are a pain in the ass.

7. It depends on how they communicate it. I *prefer* women who are actually strong and independent. If your profile/ initial behavior communicates to me that you have your own career and goals, your own cool life, that you’re a competent adult with a plan for the future, and that you’re looking for a partner and not a head of household, that’s awesome.

   If your profile gives off a borderline hostile, obnoxious vibe, that’s a pass for me.

8. Depends on context but experience has told it often means one of two things: “I have a chip on my shoulder and will argue about everything” or “I’m a single mom struggling to make ends meet but don’t want to sound like I’m looking for a man to support me”

   This is purely anecdotal based on women I have met or friends have dated that describe themselves this way.

9. A Ballbuster?

10. “I’m a bitch and treat people poorly”

11. I like strong and independent women. But if they’re shouting it from the rooftops, it’s a light red flag. Proceed with caution.

12. No strong independent person of any gender has to announce it to the world, you’re probably just a cunt.

13. Quick swipe to the left

14. I like strong and independent women but I dislike women that explicitly describe themselves as ‘a strong and independent woman’. Does that make sense?

15. Complete waste of letters. What the fuck does it even mean?

    Just about every woman has a job, interests and can manage their basic adult chores without mummy and daddy. What makes you more independent than that?

    What makes you strong compared to other women? Or men for that matter?

    Tell me what you expect from a potential match and what you offer in return. Tell me about what you do for a living and what your hobbies are.

16. Much like this line in GoT:

    “Any man who must say, ‘I am the king’ is no true king.”
    -Tywin Lannister

    Someone saying they are such-and-so, are more likely trying to convince themselves more than anything.

17. If it’d followed by “bad / boss bitch” then it’s a major red flag

    If it’s followed by ‘ceo’ I know they are either a hairdresser or part of a mlm

    If it’s followed by healthy qualities and activities then i know they’re not full of shit

18. most of the time on dating profiles that’s going to be a red flag. it basically means i’m going to be a bitch, justify it, and if you don’t like it you are just supporting the patriarchy.

19. Even if the intent is good, it just sounds off-putting.

20. The adjectives “strong and independent” spoken or wrote by a woman in that specific order, generally being used to antagonize men, it’s a massive red flag, as you don’t even know her yet, and she’s already hostile.

    Women who are strong, independent, and mentally healthy don’t feel the need to actually say that they are strong and independent.

21. Same as any woman should feel when reading a profile by a guy who uses the term “Alpha” or even “Nice guy”….beware.

22. It’s the female equivalent of fellas calling themselves “alpha”.

    Hard pass.

23. Same way I’d interpret a dude calling themselves alpha or sigma.

    Or when a mother calls herself a momma bear.

    Gives strong vibes that their entire existence and worldview would be intolerable

24. If your profile suggests you are one, that’s a turn on.
    If your profile says it, I interpret it as nope

25. “Generally unpleasant woman to be around”

    The man who tells the world he is king is anything but

26. If you really feel the need to say it its definitley not true and youre just a performative asshole. Pretty much the female version of a self described “alpha male”

27. I know this is ask men, but as a woman I just want to chime in I say this phrase all the time ironically 😅 I don’t plan to use any online dating services but I’ll be sure to consider the joke may not transfer well over text based on the comments here haha.

28. She don’t need no man… Next profile

29. My wife is a strong and independent woman. She never said it on her dating profile but it was very clear when we met. Hell, she makes double, nearly triple my salary. And I’m making a good amount myself.

    For me, it doesn’t matter. She’s career driven but is a family person too. She’s the best mother ever, best wife ever, and she never neglects anything.

    We met online. She made it very clear what her goals were. Over a decade later, we’re still happy. Don’t let the words “strong and independent” deter you. They’re just words.

30. Toxic feminism.

31. “I’m an asshole, especially to men.”