I was just realizing that I can’t remember the last time someone called me just to talk, outside of work. Or the last time someone invited me to do anything.

Outside of social media, how many friends do y’all really have? And do you think it’s a function of age? (I’m in my mid 40s.)

40 comments

  5. Close friends, about a dozen between friends I’ve had since high school and my late partner’s close friends who I bonded with after he passed.

    Maybe another dozen of mid-tier friends (eg: people I like a lot but not the first people I’d call if I really needed help with something).

  9. Close friends 3, good friends I see once every few weeks 3, friends I’ve met but mainly talk online/game together 4. So 10 altogether 👍

  10. I’m 31 and first and foremost I got my best friend who I have known for the longest. She’s been with me from our middle school days. She’s the one person I’m the closest to. So much people compared us to Scully and Mulder from The X Files. Then I got my gf, and the lady friends so that amounts to fourteen friends. Like I might not have known my gf’s lady friends for as long, but they made sure to make me know that they have “adopted” me. Giving me cutesy nicknames they call me in public, in front of people. Being overprotective and all that.

    Although outside of that social circle I’m pretty much alone. I like nerdy stuff but I’m not a nerdy person so that works against me. I don’t have the same things as my bread and butter of how I enjoy a piece of media. Or at least I don’t present what I do like in the same way. While on the other end I don’t have myself fused to the wooden and two dimensional mentality that seems to come with a lot of the non-nerdy stuff I’m into. It just seems pointless to abandon that pure joy and casual mentality you have when you get into something. Or at least I haven’t found many online communities that have a more laid back and casual approach to those sort of interests and hobbies.

  12. Is that what a freind is? I have a dozen or so people that I could call and hang out with. But I just don’t.

  13. I have nine dudes that I consider close friends and two gals.

    By close I mean that I would share most everything with them and they with me and we communicate several times a week to daily.

    About a dozen others on the peripherals that I keep in contact with and enjoy the company of when we’re together.

  16. Good friends now or old friends I can call up for a beer when I’m working where they live? Good friends now, the number is probably 3. Old friends, dozens.

  17. 0, but that’s my fault. It’s pretty late in life, but between depression and some other mental issues I’ve struggled with, it made it very hard to maintain friendships.

  20. Zero.

    I like to fix this number one day but honestly never have the courage to do it. Either too tired from work or have other shit I got to do.

  21. I’m 40. I’ve got a solid half dozen I’d call close, inner-circle, then maybe twice that in more chill friends that I’m not as close with but love nonetheless.

  24. Around 10-12 on our WhatsApp and insta group

    0 if we count how many of them ever call me

  25. None. The last time I had any kind of friends was in high school and that was 20 years ago. Sometimes it’s hard to apply for certain things because they usually want references (aka friends) that are not family members.

  26. I’m 33. I have 5 (3m2f) true friends. We get together at least once a month. We have a group chat that’s active at least once a week. We might call each other once a year, otherwise we just organize and chat via text.

  27. 5. They mean the absolute world to me. I’m in regular contact with them. It’s kind of hard as we’re all in our mid-30’s with lives and marriages, but we make it work.

  31. I’m about the same age as you. I’d say 2-3 and that’s after a long process of weeding people out over the years.

  32. I have a few “friends”. How many can I call on, out of the blue if I needed something? One.

  33. I’ve built a lot of social circles so I would say I have a lot of friends.

    That being said….I could shut my phone off for a week and I wouldn’t be shocked if I turned it back on and the only texts were from my parents

  34. Not as many as I thought!

    I was tired of being the one who has to make the effort, so my New Year’s resolution was to contact no one and wait for them to contact me. It’s looking to be a lonely year!

  35. I’m 26 and I have this 1 dude my homie but not anymore. I considered him my best friend but realized I ain’t really his best friend? By best friend, you would share almost everything with them, whenever you wanna hang, you will wanna hang with em cause it makes it 10x more fun. Realized how we don’t really hang when I don’t invite him out and dude’s calculative af~ Have my eyes wide opened since then and now I only talk to him out of benefits~

    I don’t really consider someone I know a friend cause whenever you’re in deep shit, the “friends” we know of wouldn’t offer anything and just avoid you. Best friend were a thing but not anymore. Everyone just leeches off of each other nowadays.

  37. People that would talk/call me? 0

    To those that would invite me? 1 but unfortunately his times never work with my times so I always have to miss out.

    People I reliably talk to on a weekly to monthly basis? 2

  39. Mid 30s here.

    Depends how you look at it. At a minimum 1, maximum 3.

    I’d lean towards 1 real friend and 2 buddies who are friends but moved away so we don’t see each other often anymore

    It’s a function of age for sure. Life happens, people work, get families or move. Also, speaking personally, I’m wayyyy more picky with who I give the time of day to as I get older. I’m happy with my wife, son, and immediate family and don’t need or want anything else

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