I’ve tried experimenting a bit for other people’s sake, but I just don’t really enjoy fucking in exotic positions, anything with degradation or bdsm, anal, or any really kinky shit.
I can’t help but feel like this makes me boring in today’s age.
Should I just be upfront about it, and accept that this will be a dealbreaker with a lot of women?
Also bonus question, do you try to change it up every time you have sex or do you just try to find what they (and you) enjoy best and then run with that?
4 comments
It’s not a deal breaker with a lot of women. Just be good at making your partner cum, that’s really all ya gotta do
I wouldn’t worry about being “boring” that’s just a label that is really not relevant.
The key is to engage fully with your lovers. You won’t” bore” them if you talk to them, listen to them, pleasure them, stimulate them, make them feel alive. Satisfy them.
Are they going to call you boring if you just gave them the best stream of orgasms that they’ve ever had? I think not.
It isn’t about boring, it’s about compatibility. You and your potential partners both deserve to be with someone who they are compatible with. Trust me, you will not want to be with someone who needs kink/bdsm to feel satisfied, because you won’t satisfy her and you’ll resent each other.
So yes, disclose it.
I think the clue here is “today’s age”. Let’s elaborate: what’s that, precisely – compared to “not today”?
I’m sure, people had kinks all the time throughout history, there were just times, they were allowed to tell, others the weren’t. So, the only change is, that today, it’s presented openly. It’s suggested in advertising, movies, on the internet, here etc. And as always with media: the loudest presentation sticks.
So don’t let yourself be fooled: I’m sure, there are more than enough people loving “vanilla” and being completely satisfied with that.
“Vanilla” doesn’t necessarily mean “missionary4ever”. There are shades – and you can use them, without pulling out the whip and cuffs š
The only thing, you should never do: Don’t pretend to be somebody you are not. Don’t pretend to have kinks, you don’t. This will make your partners miserable as their desires are not met. No judging – this is just a plain compatibility issue as u/takeahikehike put it so perfectly.