I am a 20y/o male from the UK and since a young age I’ve always had huge ambitions in life, from creating a business to inventing things in the future, the list goes on. I personally hate the thought of having a normal job until retirement without having actually achieved anything. I have worked 3 different jobs since 15 years old and recently quit my job in January to forex trade.
What I have noticed since quitting is the lack of ambitious people around me. The only friends I’ve got have similar interests like going to the gym or cars you know just general friend stuff, but nobody in my circle has similar ambitions or life goals as me, I’d go as far as to say they are quite lazy people.
I never really thought about this problem because when I worked in construction everyone round you are all the same and there to do a job but now I’m solo it’s way harder than I thought to network with people and make new friends with similar ambitions.
My parents are constantly on at me to get another job blah blah but they just don’t understand what I am trying to achieve even after explaining to them.
I’d like some serious advice from people who have been in a similar situation to this.
* How to network with people
* Good websites or apps that can aid this process
* How to find and make friends of similar interests
* Any other advice that will help me out
7 comments
Try being lazier and less productive. This should help you bond with other people better.
I would start by finding a job in an incredibly competitive career field. You need a base of experience before anyone is going to take you seriously anyway, unless you already have a well thought out and planned idea that’s going to get a business rolling for you. It might not appeal to you now, but you’re essentially cutting your teeth in preparation for when you want to take your own bite of the apple. Experience like this will teach you things you didn’t even realise you needed to know, you will have problems thrown at you that you never anticipated and be responsible for solving them.
The objective of having a job like this is really to start building contacts and expose yourself to stress, problem solving/delivering under stress and basically refining your mental framework into a sharp point.
For context, I now work for myself, but I put 10 years of time in to a career that had highly skilled and intelligent people everywhere so I could hone my skills and experience until I had something genuinely worth selling. I also understood the business and business model while I was on someone else’s dime. Which means they are essentially paying for my mistakes while I learnt the lessons.
If you want to find friends that do this kind of stuff, you have to go and do this kind of stuff and make friends along the way. Be prepared to sacrifice everything else in your life if you want to succeed at making your own way though. I spent almost my entire 20’s doing overtime, sleeping in a rented apartment with no furniture and moving from city to city whenever the right package of work came up to give me the experience I needed.
You will also need to start building up your own financial security during this stage, so forget living a flash life and keeping up with the Joneses. Trying to look rich is expensive, and will stop you actually being financially independent in the long run.
As for starting out, you need a rough idea of what you want to do to begin with. I started my professional life as an accountant, did that for 18 months and decided it was massively shit. 6 of those 18 months were spend doing research into markets I could work in that either had a skill shortage now, or would in the next 10-15 years. I quit that job and now I run my own small consultancy business. I’ve only been doing it just over a year but I’m already raking it in and looking to grow. Most of my business comes from contacts I’ve built up during the 10 years I spent working for the man.
If you’re Forex trading successfully then stick with that, but manage your pot so you don’t get overextended. Don’t delude yourself into thinking this will be a sure thing forever though, as if you don’t plan for one or two rough patches that will sink you completely. If you can demonstrate a decent managed portfolio, I’d go and find somewhere to trade with someone else’s money and start building up contacts from within the industry.
You want to improve ? 1. What you see your self as ? What job , what career. 2. Then you go find people.
Example :You want to be driver you find people who like cars .
So first thing you have to decide what you want to be
Absolutely not, you’re the right path.
You’re the sum total of the 5 people you hangout with. If you hang out with 5 Losers the sixth one is you.
Don’t be around with lazy bums who does nothing in their life. You’ll become one of them. And don’t try to fit in. You’ll only make friends through your work or big social clubs.
Online friends I don’t think that’s the route. Try big social clubs for networking like men’s golf club for example.
Do some volunteer work. You will find some people with good morals and higher self esteem. Ambition is more likely to be a common trait.
You remind me of my younger self. I had mentors back then.
My advise
Search for older business people.
I founded my first company#15yo.
Talk to the business chamber, to banks and politicians to find older mentors.
Do not underestimate the dark side inside humans. Nog a lot of people are pairing with you – most want to steal or to exploit you.
Do not be afraid to sent a letter tl the secratary of a 20.000 employees companys ceo with the honest request to help you on your way.
You will be astonished how many people help you if they see that you really eant to change things.
Don’t Forex trade. It’s a scam like MLM and essential oils.
Do pursue an entrepreneurial path. Offer people something they need. You’ve done construction, that’s a good start, but be your own boss. If you can start as a handyman, you can grow that to being a building contractor, and you can go anywhere from there. For example.
Want to invent something? Here’s an idea. Rain gutters that are actually attractive and are built into new construction, rather than being shit tacked on to the finished product. As an added bonus, use LED technology so that they include christmas lights built in. Do it in a way that’s invisible until you turn them on, so that home owners are 60% finished with their christmas light installation simply by flipping a switch on December 1 and flipping it back off December 26.
Edit: I didn’t really answer networking question. Efficient, entrepreneurial people who really create value and get shit done will seek you out if you are an efficient, entrepreneurial person. When people see you doing that, they will use your product or service because you are good. You will deliver on time and above quality for them and they will come to rely on you. When they go other places, YOU will go those places, too. Same the other way around: When you find other vendors or service providers, you will use them again and again. A QUICK friendly word when interacting is all you need. The phone call you make that says: “Hey, Bob, I solved your problem, you can relax now,” and MEAN it will do more for you than anything else.
I’d suggest you get in the habit of using your spare time to build skills you can sell people. Read what Scott Adams says about building a skill stack.