At what point did you realize you were being manipulated?

12 comments

1. I always knew. Just didn’t know what they wanted. So I allowed the manipulation, figured out where they wanted me to go, broke the trap and punished the perpetrator.

2. When that tiny voice in the back of your head that screams there’s something wrong. Then you hang on for like 6 months and she wrecks you. That’s about when

3. When we were out for dinner and she was constantly texting, and when asked if there was an emergency, she said no, just this other guy I’m talking to, but don’t worry, I’m totally more interested in you 😂😂😂 as you’re texting him while out with me probably saying the same thing and enjoying what you thought was another free meal haha paid my portion and told her to have a good night.

4. This is such an ambiguous question. 🤦‍♂️

5. Persuasion and manipulation can seem similar.

   The difference is honesty and intent. When someone persuades, they are honest about their intentions.

   When someone manipulates they are duplicitous.

6. After spending 32k in one year covering the 3rd wifes bad checks…

7. Ha! Bold of you to assume i am useful enough for someone to want to manipulate me

8. Not sure if it was manipulation, but in retrospect there were a lot of things in a previous relationship with an ex that could be seen that way.

   * Within the first few months she got me to download an app that would track my every movement, allowing her to open it and find my location, where I’d been, etc. Initially under the guise of “so I can know you’re safe”. She had her phone set up to notify her whenever I left my flat, whenever I went to a friend’s house, etc. If the location cut out, she’d phone or text to ask why.
   * If I ever left my flat, she’d phone or text to ask what I was up to. Who I was seeing. For how long. Where I was going.
   * If I stayed at a place for more than 30 minutes longer than I said I would be, she’d phone or text to ask me why.
   * If I was out and about and said I’d be preoccupied, there were occasions where she’d get angry with me if I wasn’t having a full text conversation with her. Only happened a couple of times because I put my foot down and said “If I said I’m doing xyz, I can’t be talking with you all the time on my phone”.
   * She constantly told me she dreamed I might break up with her.
   * She always had some stress going on in her life and kept telling me if there was anything else that added to that she’d “go to a really dark place”.
   * She’d occasionally bring up that she’s had suicide attempts caused by breakups with guys a few times in the past leading to hospitalisation, some she’d only known for a month.
   * A few times after some of our disagreements she’d say “I thought you didn’t love me any more and I was so close to killing myself”.

   Eventually broke up with her and I’m now relieved to have that out of my life.

9. The day after “I do”

10. When they had no answers to me questioning the “rules for thee, not rules for me” issues.

11. Never realized, until it all came crashing down.

12. The second she began a sentence with “a real man”